Lessons of Salvation - Life Equals Eternity

81. And in whom [Satan] succeeds in fulfilling his will, he leads him out of the monastery into the world, into his former state. (79) Satan does not only lead people out of the monastery. It happens that a person has left his former sinful life, has taken the path of repentance, but because of his inattention he accepts demonic thoughts, and the demons kindle passions in him and try to lure him, a monk from the monastery, a layman from the church. In patristic literature there is such a comparison: just as a dog tries to grab a piece of meat, drag it aside and eat it there calmly, so the demons try to lure a person out of the salvific church environment and, when he is left alone, seized by his pride, finally destroy him. We need to struggle with all our might against thoughts of dissatisfaction with our situation and murmuring against people, and even more so against God. Very often monks are confused by thoughts that they need to move from one monastery to another, those who work in the church - that they need to move to another church, family people - that they need to create another family. All these are the enemy's temptations. The Holy Fathers teach that we should change our place of residence only in cases when the environment inclines us to sin and there is a threat of falling. As long as people around us sin and we do not (meaning grave, gross sins), we must struggle with thoughts of condemnation, pray for everyone. But if we are drawn into sins, if, for example, a husband not only drinks himself, but also drags his wife into drunkenness, or he himself fornicates and inclines her to do the same, then yes, we need to flee from a place where we become infected with evil from those around us. When we are simply not honored, we are simply told something wrong or were not given something, then all this is just good for the soul. 82. One should not be proud: God resists the proud, but gives grace to the humble. There is no need to be vain, but to attribute all that we have to the glory of God: not to us, O Lord, not to us, but to Thy name give glory. (139) Not everyone knows the difference between pride and vanity. A vain person in his soul cares about how he appears before people, but a proud person sometimes does not care how people think of him, it is enough for him that he thinks highly of himself. Pride must still be recognized. "The signs of pride are humiliation or contempt of one's neighbors and negligence about confession, and pride itself is imperceptible to a person," writes St. Ignatius Brianchaninov. Not everyone, perhaps, understands why vanity is so bad. A person does good deeds, and he wants people to praise him for them. But this very desire convicts him of caring not for heavenly things, but for earthly things. No matter what good deeds a person does, they bring him nothing for eternity, if he is concerned not with the eternal, but with the temporal. By the way, about the love of money. We are mostly not rich people, but it is not a matter of the amount of money, things, houses and cars, but of the fact that we have a surplus, something that would be better done without. What is Surplus? This is all that we acquire through love of glory, voluptuousness, and love of money. If a person buys himself a steel spoon, and not an aluminum one, because he is ashamed in front of guests, then this spoon will be a luxury for him. If a person puts money on a book, hoping that it will save him from some adversity, it means that he does not hope in God, and this money turns out to be his condemnation. Weddings alone are worth a lot. Because of petty vanity, a lot of money is spent that could be given to the young to buy themselves something really necessary. And we, instead of confessing: "Lord, I am weak, out of vanity I arrange these feasts", we think that we are hospitable hosts (how can people be offended). Hospitality is when, say, you want to be alone, but a person comes and asks to let him spend the night. And we do not lie down to sleep, but cook food for him, make his bed - in general, we sacrifice our time and energy. And when we receive well-fed and satisfied guests, spending a lot of money on it, this is vanity in its purest form. 83. "Learn from Me, that I am meek." Who is the Teacher? And the proud and vain cannot be at peace anywhere; and they cannot be in the Kingdom of Heaven unless all this is purified here. (276) The cause of our anxiety, of all our temptations and sorrows, is pride and vanity. It is they who prevent us from entering the Kingdom of Heaven. Many people believe that we are small, weak people, and the commandments are written for the strong. Not at all. In order to humble yourself, you don't need anything special. It is more difficult to humble yourself for a strong, gifted person. Those who do not have any special physical, spiritual or spiritual gifts are easier to humble themselves. That is why God usually does not give them to us, so that at least we are not tempted by this. 84. All importance lies in humility alone; No matter how many prostrations you make, and if you think that you are leading a cruel life, what is there in these labors? Nothing at all. (297) This applies literally to all of us. It can be assumed that he does not belong to any particularly dangerous criminals, but, as far as I know from literature, even people who lead a grossly sinful life, nevertheless, find something to praise themselves for, boast of their evil deeds. And if a person does not commit grave sins, then he considers himself almost a saint, he praises himself for everything. Thoughts that praise us should be looked upon as robbers. By doing a good deed, we, figuratively speaking, acquire a treasure for eternity, but as soon as we praise ourselves, we let the thief in - and we are left with nothing. In St. John of the Ladder we read about an ascetic who had great gifts from God, but, unfortunately, took credit for them. When he was dying, demons approached him before the eyes of the brethren and began an argument with him. He began to justify himself to them, and thus, arguing with the demons, his soul departed into eternity. And there is no certainty that the posthumous fate of this ascetic is consoling. We should not rely on works and gifts, but only on God. Whether we live well or badly, we live worse than we should. 85. A Traveler... he saved money for a bell in a certain hermitage and before the time was ripe he said: how will he bring it and leave it at the monastery gates, and he himself will go into the forest; they will see, be surprised, and guess: "Ah! This is Bratkov, for sure" - they will go to look for him, as they will treat him and thank him! He went swimming and drowned, and that was the end of all his plans! (299) This man was naïve. Of course, we are not so naïve, we usually do not say anything like this out loud, but only in our hearts we delight in dreams of glory and honor. Vanity is our common misfortune. It plunders the heart of man, leaving us spiritually barren. There is a story about a girl who did many good deeds, and everyone respected her for it. After her death, the maiden appeared in a vision to her acquaintance - she appeared weeping and unhappy. An acquaintance asked: "Why do you feel so bad, since you lived virtuously?" She answered: "I lived virtuously, but everyone respected and praised me, and I accepted these praises." The Monk Barsanuphius the Great said that woe to the man whose name is higher than his deeds. The same thought, reproaching himself, was repeated more than once by St. Macarius of Optina. This is how the Holy Fathers taught and lived, they tried to hide their virtues, avoided glory and praise. And we, on the contrary, try our best to make people think of us better than we really are. We are partly right. If we suddenly saw ourselves and those around us without embellishment, as we really are, then we would fall through the ground from horror and shame. It is much more useful for our souls when people scold us rather than praise us. But we usually do not receive this benefit, since we do not seek humility. When I am not honored, not appreciated, deprived of something or humiliated, then in my heart I am indignant and condemn people who do not want to honor my idol - my "I". I myself worship him and therefore I believe that I have the right to expect the same from others. The one who does not want to worship my idol is naturally a heretic. He is an atheist who rejects my divinity. This is how the ancient pagans reasoned, and so do we, modern Christian pagans. 86. You complain about your mental disorder; you cannot overcome a proud temper and a hot-tempered habit, and even more so the condemnation of others. To this I answer Your Reverence: we are now not in a worldly life, but in a spiritual one; You have just entered into it and should be considered a novice, then it is not surprising that the ingrained habit in worldly life overcomes spiritual life. (146) And we are all novices, so we need not be surprised that passions live in us. It is good that we want to be cleansed of passions, that we want to live sinlessly, but we need to know that our illness is serious, and just as a person, when he is seriously ill, needs to be treated for a long time, so we need to tune in to a long, lifelong repentance. Don't think that I'm going to get down to business and become a saint in two weeks. For God, of course, everything is possible, such exceptional cases have happened, but it has always been associated with great suffering. Usually, a person struggles with himself all his life, and his whole life, whether short or long, is spent in the struggle with his passions. If he does not fall into despair, does not give up, fights, repents, then God, of course, will not deceive him, and he will enter the Kingdom of Heaven. 87. Many people desire to see something in a dream, but they go mad because of it, and there is no need to wish because it sometimes leads to pride, they say: "Here I am worthy of a vision; And this is from the enemy. (322) Even if a true vision comes to us, we should not tell anyone about it unless absolutely necessary. But people like us cannot expect true visions. We do not want to be saved, we are not interested in the real spiritual life, but out of pride, vanity and curiosity we want special experiences, visions, miracles. True experiences, those that are from God, are given by grace, when the Lord deems it necessary, and not when we ourselves seek it. So if there is a vision for miracles, it is at best a product of their own fallen nature. At worst, it has come to the point that God allows demons to act. St. Isaac the Syrian said that whoever approaches a speculative life for the sake of its sweetness before learning an active life, finds the wrath of God upon him. An active life means a struggle with one's passions, the fulfillment of God's commandments. When a person is significantly successful in this, he can, by a special calling and blessing of God, pass on to a contemplative life, which is indeed associated with many consolations. But people who have not yet labored in the fulfillment of God's commandments, who are not called by God to a contemplative life, but strive for it only because of spiritual voluptuousness, incur the wrath of God. They often fall into demonic delusion or go mad. 88. If the Lord God judges us not according to our sins, but according to the salvific actions we have performed, then even here not everyone living will be justified; but rather let us put our trust in His great mercy; There is no need to despair - who can be worthy? (11) In literature and painting, a not very successful plot is common: at the Last Judgment, our good and evil deeds are weighed. Too optimistic a picture. After all, our good deeds are often worse than evil ones, because we are proud of them and defile them. Under no circumstances should we rely on our virtues and calculate what we have more, good or bad. We must rely only on the mercy of God. But God expects mercy from us as well. "I desire mercy, and not sacrifice" - we read in the book of the prophet Hosea (Hosea 6:6). This should be understood not in such a way that by giving to the poor or donating to the church, we pay for some of our sins, but in such a way that, by showing mercy to our neighbors, a person attracts God's mercy to himself. In the Acts of the Holy Apostles, the case of Cornelius the centurion is described, who was a pagan, but, believing in God, lived virtuously. In itself this could not save him, but his prayers and almsgiving, as the angel said to him, "came as a memorial before God" (Acts 10:4). And God sent the Apostle Peter to him, who baptized him, and then Cornelius, having taken the path of Christ, received salvation. 89. If you do anything good, then do not ascribe it to God's helpful goodness, then evil and a fall will follow. (247) Here we are talking about good deeds that are not characteristic of us. Of course, it happens that we do something good, but we always forget that this is not our gift to God, but, on the contrary, God in His love gives us the grace-filled power so that we can do something good at least sometimes. It would be natural to thank the Lord for this from the bottom of our hearts. But, blinded by pride, we attribute all the good to ourselves, to our imaginary goodness, to our fictitious righteousness. The deeds themselves remain good (for example, someone cares for the sick or does good to the Church, someone works hard, prays a lot), but for eternity they are devalued by our self-satisfaction. It is for this insane pride that the Lord is forced to punish us, again for our admonition. Sometimes, as a healing punishment, we are allowed to fall. In other words, we are tempted and, failing to resist it, fall into sin. Such a fall, as a cure for pride, is called upon to humble us, to induce us to repentance, and to teach us to soberly evaluate the thoughts that come to us. The Lord Himself, again having mercy on us with His grace, helps us to rise. How successful such a "therapy" will be, whether we want to accept His help, depends only on us.

Obedience

We do not listen to God, but to our unclean hearts * Spiritual progress is in cutting off one's will * Satan takes the wayward into his power * A person is free if he does not part with God * Passions deprive us of freedom, not circumstances * Strong people are obedient, not weak * Irritation against elders is a satanic feeling * It is easier to save oneself on low obediences * Troubles are sent to us for salvation * "Innocent" passions * We trust ourselves more, What the saints trusted themselves * Why the devil does not tolerate guidance * It is good when desires are not fulfilled * Despair is the fruit of resistance to God * 90. The unhumble, the disobedient, the disobedient - only to the detriment of his soul he lives in a monastery. (477) This applies not only to monastics. Any person lives to the detriment of his soul if he does not humble himself, does not reject his will and does not obey. One should not neglect this property of the human soul - obedience. A person can live in such an environment that there is no one to obey. But if his heart is obedient, he will obey God. And God will find a way to declare His will to him. And when the heart is stubborn, not inclined to obedience, then a person can live among the spirit-bearing elders, and this will not give him anything, because he will listen not to them, but to his own impure heart. 91. Any obedience can save: obedience is more than fasting and prayer. (341) This refers to monastic obedience, a work entrusted to a monk, which for some reason may not please him. But if he rejects his will and fulfills obedience without murmuring, then it will bring him more benefit than even fasting and prayer. 92. Where there is no obedience, there is no God, and there is no guardian angel; and where there is obedience, there is God, there is an Angel. (418) It may be harsh, but it is accurate. When a person is determined to do his own will, then even the guardian angel departs from him. "Spiritual success must be sought in the cutting off of one's will," wrote St. Ignatius Brianchaninov. This is the root of Orthodox asceticism. Without the rejection of self-will, spiritual growth is impossible. Whether it is the monastic path, where the monk cuts off his will before the abbot and the brethren, whether it is the path of obedience to the Spirit-bearing elder, whether it is the path of a layman with no instructors, in any case the path to salvation lies through the renunciation of one's own will. "This deed mortifies the passions and leads us out, as from hell, from carnal wisdom," writes St. Ignatius. The rejection of self-will allows the Divine will to be freely manifested in us, and the whole meaning of asceticism is to harmonize our will with the will of God. 93. The abbess must be honored. Those who revere her are touched by the grace of God; but those who neglect this duty, the grace of God departs from them, and the enemy takes such into his power. Neglect means pride, and God opposes the proud. (70) Veneration is not spoken of in the sense that the abbot, or the superior, or the parents are necessarily holy. It is not said, "Honor your holy parents," it says, "Honor your father and your mother." This applies to all earthly rulers, since all fatherhood and all rulership is an image of God's fatherhood and God's rulership. Obedience is pleasing, dear to God, leads into communion with God, and murmuring is harmful. We are obliged to fight against murmuring, self-will, and pride, and to respect the authorities. If the boss encourages us to sin, to violate the commandments, then, of course, we should not obey. But in life, this happens very rarely. Usually there is simply something that is not according to us, something we do not like, and we inwardly rebel against our spiritual fathers, parents, superiors, and this is where our pride is manifested. And there is no need to justify yourself with the benefit of the cause or anything else. All those who tried to rebel against the authorities of their own free will experienced that "the enemy takes such people into his power." It is better not to take risks and not to try. It's like trying to lie under a car. Of course, he can slow down. Then we will experience that we almost died. Or maybe not slow down and crush us. So it is wiser to fulfill God's commandment: "Honor your father and your mother." God gives grace out of His mercy, and we lose it for our sins. Whether God will ever want to give grace again is unknown to us, so it is better to keep it in obedience. 94. Here is my advice: the superior should immediately obey what she says, as if it were God's command. Whatever obedience there is, everything is to the Lord God. (420) When a boss (any boss, not just the one we like) gives us an assignment, we shouldn't speculate about how wise the boss is, whether he's mistaken or not. It is necessary, without hesitation, to fulfill this commission, unless, of course, it is a question of violating the commandments of God. Even if the boss makes a mistake, we do not make a mistake in obeying him. It is very important to cut off your will before God and not to trust your thoughts. We must serve God and be inwardly free, have freedom in God, no matter what position we occupy in the world. Worldly status can be high, but if a person is bound by his passions, he will never be free. And vice versa, in the lowest position (being in a concentration camp, sitting in solitary confinement, etc.), a person can remain internally free if he does not part with God. We are bound hand and foot by our passions. They deprive us of freedom, not external circumstances. 95. If I do not listen to the abbess, I will not listen to Christ, the Son of God. (425) Through the rulers, the will of God is proclaimed. And it is easier to obey the one who is freer from passions. When the soul is seized by desires that seem good to us, we are unable to obey either God or people - desires tear us apart. Gradually freeing himself from passions, a person receives inner freedom, it becomes easier for him to listen to both God and people. Obedience should not be confused with compliance. Strong, strong-willed natures are more capable of obedience. A weak-willed person is disobedient because obedience requires overcoming internal and external obstacles, and this requires a strong will, perseverance, and perseverance. 96. One should accept obedience not with vexation, not with a frowning face, but with love, as from God Himself, with joy, in silence. (420) Whatever position we occupy, we are essentially slaves if we simply submit to force and do what our soul does not desire. If we were to seek the will of God and, whether we like it or not, act according to it, we would always have peace in our souls. And often it turns out that we do something unwillingly, but only out of fear or to please someone. It also happens that a person does a seemingly good deed, but not for the sake of God, but out of vanity, self-interest or other passion. Everyone can notice that very often, when the boss is at work, the priest is at church, parents give instructions to children, then a certain feeling of resistance and protest arises inside. This special irritation against the elders is a satanic feeling. The devil tries to turn the younger ones against the elders, in order to deprive everyone of all edification and guidance, to lead everyone astray, confuse and destroy them. 97. The lowest obediences, and with the memory of God, are higher than the lofty ones performed with scattered thoughts. (422) It is obvious that the basis of striving for high obediences is pride and, of course, its closest friends: vanity, love of money, voluptuousness. If we were guided not by pride, but by the desire to fulfill the will of God, then we would humbly, with the fear of God, take up important, significant deeds that are entrusted to us, and we would go to low obediences with love and gratitude. In low obediences it is easier to be saved. That is why the Holy Fathers always tried to avoid lofty obediences, but sought out the lowest ones. In our case, it is the opposite. But if this is so, if our state of mind is opposite to that which possessed the saints, then we need urgent help - repentance, repentance and repentance. 98. Whatever obedience may be, even if it is with the memory of God, it is an acceptable sacrifice to the Lord God. (421) It is a common temptation to evaluate obediences as high and low, pleasant and unpleasant. But it is not the content of obedience that is important, but the attitude towards it. You can be a bishop, you can be a president, but if you live absent-mindedly, to please your passions, then you are a complete nothing before God. Or you can clean the manure in the cowshed, but at the same time have the memory of God, and this work will turn out to be a sacrifice pleasing to God. It is very useful to mentally transfer, with all the external and internal circumstances of our life, to the Last Judgment. Here everything immediately falls into place. On the one hand, we see that almost all of our ordinary joys, for which we are ready to thank God from the bottom of our hearts (if we remember Him at all), are not good for us. After all, what are we usually happy about? From bodily pleasures, worldly successes, material acquisitions - from that which has nothing to do with eternal life. On the other hand, it becomes clear that all the troubles and injustices, insults, humiliations, illnesses and failures, everything that we constantly grumbled about, were sent to us for salvation. If we endured these hardships with good humor, if we endured them by thanking God, then through this we would be prepared for eternal life. That is why the memory of God, the memory of death, is a great gift of God. But the Lord does not force His gifts on those who reject them, on those who do not thirst for them. Let us labor with our minds, let us labor with our spirits, urging ourselves to the memory of death, let us try to desire our salvation. And the Lord does not refuse those who hunger for righteousness. 99. When you are told, "Go there," and you always answer only, "Bless," then you would have many who are being saved. And instead of that, the opposite thought: that I am alone, that there are no others, that I am sick, that others do nothing, that I am all one, is not the property of those who are being saved. (426) This is the typical mental wind that arises in our head when we are asked to do something. If a person gives himself over to these thoughts, if he does not reject them, it is difficult for him to be saved. 100. One was called to obedience while he was writing; It was necessary to draw one line to complete the word, and he left that too. (426) This is an example from the Otechnik, very instructive. A certain elder in the wilderness had many disciples, but he loved one more than the others, and everyone grumbled against him for this. They complained to another elder. He began to ask the first: "Why do you love this monk so much?" They began to enter the cells of the disciples and asked them to do something. Everyone answered: I will finish what I have begun now, and I will come. We also went to the "favorite". He did not even finish the word, he immediately ran to fulfill his obedience. It was then that everyone understood why the elder was so disposed towards this monk. 101. Those who are humble, those who are patient, those who are obedient, must follow. (431) The renunciation of one's will for the sake of God's will is the most important moment in spiritual life. If we never take this path, I don't know how we will be saved. Nothing good can be expected from self-will. Even our good deeds are most often associated with self-will. We do them for the sake of some passion. Passions often have a decent appearance. Passions are not necessarily drunkenness, fornication, theft, something obviously bad. A person is strongly attached to his children, relatives, loves science, art, and his work. These are seemingly innocent attachments, but they nail us to the earthly, temporary, and without condemning them in ourselves, without trying to get rid of them, we will not attain the Kingdom of God. Having taken the path of rejection of his will, a person can save his soul with relatively little effort. God does not require anything special from us. St. Theophan the Recluse says that if a person lives a correct inner life, then gradually God Himself leads him into the necessary feats. Without unnecessary effort, without unnecessary reflection on the part of man, the Lord Himself saves the one who has completely trusted Him. 102. What you know, you know from demons; when the elder says anything, it is from God, now it is holy. (476) The very rejection of one's will is good. Volition is given to man in order to seek the will of God, and not his own - this is what is important to understand. In communication with our spiritual mentors, we should seek not our material benefits, not some external acquisitions and spiritual consolations, but spiritual success. How do we do it? You ask for advice, you will fulfill it, and if as a result of this life improves, then well done, it is right that you consulted with your mentor. And if the advice led to undesirable results, it means that he asked in vain. The Holy Fathers teach otherwise. In the book of the Monks Barsanuphius and John, such a case is described. A man came to Elder Barsanuphius and said: "My son is sick, help me." He answered: "Go. Everything will be fine." The man leaves, confident that the son will recover, and the son dies. He returns in confusion to the elder, and the elder explains that he meant spiritual, and not carnal. The soul of the deceased was "in order", that is, quite ready for a safe transition into eternity. We should build our trust in our mentors not on whether their predictions come true or not, but on how much we inwardly succeed from communicating with them. It is impossible for us to imitate the feats of the saints, but it is possible and necessary to learn from them distrust of our thoughts. We are weak and should not trust ourselves. With us, however, it is the opposite: realizing that we are weak, we do not dare to follow the path of the Holy Fathers, but we trust ourselves much more than they trusted themselves. 103. The abbess has grieved you, and you should only say with humility: I have sinned, forgive me for God's sake. (598) It is a miracle and a gift of God to be saved through leaders. Trust in a spiritual father is also a gift. Realizing our weakness and opening up to our mentor, we surrender ourselves into God's hands, and God will not allow us to go down the wrong path. A mentor is a person through whom God wants to save us, so the devil does not tolerate mentoring. He will definitely point out the shortcomings of the leader, in any way he will try to denigrate him and involve us in blasphemy. Satan's task is to break the connection with the mentor, to leave the person alone, without guidance (which is very dangerous), or to emasculate this connection, to make it formal, not bringing any benefit. "Turn away your ear from those who blaspheme the teacher, flee from those who slander him" - we read from Archimandrite Agapit of Nilo-Stolobensky. And St. John of the Ladder says that if a thought comes that blasphemes the teacher, then "as from fornication, bounce away from him." Knowing the demonic intrigues, let us be especially careful not to condemn our leaders when they rebuke or punish us. On the contrary, we should be alert if the spiritual father only caresses and welcomes. This most likely indicates our unwillingness to tolerate and endure anything. Then the mentor, in order not to finish off the weak, is forced to say only good and pleasant things. When the spiritual father scolds and rebukes us, this is a sign of some kind of trust, it is assumed that we can already endure something. 104. Obey the mother abbess in all that she has said, as if you had received it from the mouth of God Himself. (600) When spiritual questions arise, one begins to wonder which priest to turn to, which one to obey, how spiritual the person I am asking is, how capable he is of proclaiming the will of God. But we are not able to determine the spiritual measure of a person by external signs. Nor can we understand our own feelings properly. For example, there is trust in a certain person, but such a disposition is not necessarily granted to us by God. It can be carnal if it is based on purely human sympathy. Or maybe from Satan. If the enemy has inspired trust in evil people, then they begin to believe false teachers and fall into sects. First of all, we should be concerned not with who is in front of us, but with what our own intention is. If a person, turning to a spiritual father for advice, wants to cut off his will and humbly fulfill the will of God, then the Lord will never shame or deceive. When a person does not trust his reason, understands that he is a sinner, is not able to comprehend the will of God on his own, but wants to fulfill it, then this is manifested in his humility, which is pleasing to God, which attracts God's grace. This is true obedience, when a person first rejects his will and is ready to accept any blessing from God, and only then asks what he should do. In such a dispensation, God can declare His will to a person not only through a saint, but also through a weak priest, and through a layman, and even through a dumb animal. We know an example from the Holy Scriptures, when a donkey spoke with a human voice in order to restrain a person from an evil deed. So the Lord will certainly find a way to declare His will to those who do not trust themselves and hope only in the mercy of God. 105. Why should we be so concerned about the future? The Lord God will arrange for us better than what we think; one must surrender oneself to His holy will. (207) If our desires are not fulfilled, then God has something better in store for us. This is a very important and comforting thought. Therefore, there is no need to be upset when circumstances do not develop according to us. Here is an everyday example. The young man wants to enter the institute, prepares seriously, but for some reason fails at the very first exam. It must be understood that since he, despite all his efforts, did not enter the institute, it means that there was no need to enter there - there was no will of God for this. This means that God is preparing for the young man what is really necessary, useful and salvific for him. In all respects it will be right to seek and fulfill the will of God: both in the sense of our eternal salvation and in the sense of the arrangement of our temporal life. 106. Do not despair of the mercy of our Father in heaven, but try to do His will. (148) Two most important, though seemingly known to all, precepts. They are interconnected. At whatever moment in his life a person decides to do the will of God, he will receive help - God's mercy will accompany him. Even if someone has sinned all his life and angered God, he will repent and turn to God and will always be accepted with love. It does not happen that a person sincerely turns to God and does not find forgiveness. Therefore, there is no reason for despair. Despair in itself is the fruit of unbelief, the fruit of our resistance to God. 107. If one fulfills one's own will, then one must not fulfill the will of God. (417) We live according to our passions, according to our desires. When our desires are not fulfilled, we become nervous, irritated, blame our neighbors or reproach ourselves for the wrong thing - we do not repent of our sins, but scold ourselves for making a mistake. And in the end, this only leads to the multiplication of sin. If we want to live willfully, then we will inevitably turn out to be opponents of God. There is no middle ground here. Either a person will struggle with his passions and try to live according to God's commandments, or he will live according to his passions. 109. If the Lord God leaves us for one minute, where are we good? (408) We are good for nothing. Not only for a moment, if even for a brief moment the Lord leaves us, everything will disappear at once. God is the source of all things, He is the source of all good.

Humility

Part 1

Measures of Spiritual Security * What Is Inner Wealth * Humility - Knowledge of Your Sinfulness * The Lord Blesses Poverty * Compel Yourself to Do Good * Avoid Praise - Commendable * No One Is Worthy of Communion * Self-Pity Rejects from God * We Have Already Deserved Eternal Punishment * Only Those Who Are Aware of Their Weakness Can Sincerely Thank God * Our Accusers Are Our Benefactors * The Path to Peace Is Very Simple * Not Capable of Podvigs, but Capable of Enduring Sorrows * Raised the Dead and Grieved * Through temptations, we recognize our weakness * 110. Spiritual life should be simple, sincere, meek, and submissive. (1) Indeed, the spiritual life should be simple. There are God's commandments, and we must measure ourselves by them. Seeing our weakness in reasoning, we must look for a guide. If there is no teacher, then with heartfelt tears we must fall down to God, so that He Himself may lead us through life, and endure everything that He sends. If a person holds on to this Christian simplicity, then with God's help he is saved. The Elder points out: life should be sincere. What is meant here is not the great virtue of the purity of heart, which is characteristic of the perfect, the saints, which cannot be demanded of people who have just embarked on the spiritual path, but that we must be simple and sincere with people: not to be disingenuous, not to start intrigues, to rely on God. Life should be "meek, submissive." We must love to submit. When a person likes to live according to his own will, this is a sign of a serious spiritual illness - pride. We all suffer from this disease. When a person loves obedience, with God's help, he is healed of this illness and prepares for the Kingdom of Heaven. Those who do not like obedience, but like to act only according to their own reasoning, may be saved with God's help (God is all-powerful), but it is very, very difficult for them to be saved. Obedience is a very important spiritual quality. And even more important is humility. "Humility is salvation without difficulty." This is the thought not only of Theophan of Novoyezersk, it is the thought of many Holy Fathers. Even an extremely weak person who violates many commandments can reach the Kingdom of Heaven if he nevertheless sincerely humbles himself before God. God will send him sorrows that will break his heart, and through their humble patience he can be saved, even without bearing any special feats. Of course, one should not act badly on purpose, but it happens that a person wants good things, and ingrained habits (drug addiction, drunkenness, etc.) have taken possession of him so much that he is no longer able to part with them for the rest of his life. But if he humbles himself, if he bears all the sorrows that the Lord sends him good-naturedly and gratefully, then the path to salvation is not closed to him. And without humility, even an outwardly pure life does not bring any benefit to eternity. 111. The Lord God gives grace for humility. (34) Grace is withheld by humility. There is no other way to preserve grace. The saints had the highest grace-filled gifts, but being close to God, they sincerely considered themselves to be the most insignificant beings, having no merit before God. This humble consciousness provided them with spiritual security, gave them the opportunity to protect the precious gifts of grace. Unlike the saints, we are stricken with vanity and pride, which is why the vessels of our souls have been shattered, unable to receive and retain Divine grace within themselves. Humility is the only means that can glue together a spiritual vessel, restore its integrity. But unfortunately, we do not want to humble ourselves voluntarily, which forces the Lord, Who thirsts for our salvation, to send us sorrows and temptations to help us, the meek enduring of which gives rise to true humility. Our sufferings do not give pleasure to God. He loves us. He would gladly free us from all burdens and give us everything we want, even what we do not even dream of. And He will give it when He finds us humble. Thus, the whole concern of a Christian should not be to find grace, but to acquire humility. If we, with our proud heart, suddenly receive some lofty prayerful experience, some vision or revelation, then we need to be very careful. Such a state is likely to be imaginary, sent not from God, but from the enemy. If the experience is true, really sent by God, then all the more should we give ourselves over to repentant weeping, since we receive the gift of God into a vessel defiled by pride. Wanting to strengthen and sustain, God sometimes gives us some comfort. But even small crumbs of grace turn out to be unsafe for us. Those who struggle in the spiritual life know that when God sends us some spiritual consolation, it is difficult not to accept the demonic thought that praises us. The demons, wishing our destruction, when they cannot lead us into gross sin, begin to praise us for good deeds or for spiritual consolations, fueling our pride. And then God, again in His mercy, so that we do not become completely like demons, allows either temptation, or illness, or takes away grace. In the spiritual life, there is no other way. If only one is comforted by grace-filled states and has no sorrowful ones, it is easy to be carried away by arrogance and delusion. St. John of the Ladder writes that there are almost no people (one or two per century) who, because their grace increases, humble themselves even more. We are frivolous people, and therefore, having received at least some spiritual consolation, we certainly fall into complacency. 112. And just as the poor beg alms from people, so we must constantly cry out to the Lord: Lord, give me humility, patience, and obedience! (77) If we really saw ourselves in great danger, close to destruction, we would pray fervently. After all, if God does not have mercy on us and does not give us everything necessary for salvation, we will perish. But we do not pray or pray very little, because we do not feel this danger. But what to ask of God and what spiritual wealth is, this is still a question. Most Christians consider all kinds of experiences, unusual states to be spiritual gifts. In fact, you need to ask for humility, patience, obedience. Imagine a man asking, "Give me some porridge." He was given two hundred liters of porridge, but he did not have a saucepan, at least a liter. And so they put this porridge in the mud, and it was all gone. In the same way, we ask God for high gifts. And it happens that God grants them to an unworthy person for admonition, then all this, like water from a leaky vessel, is spilled and disappears, because his soul is not ready. One should not be concerned with receiving grace, but with being able to preserve it. 113. God does not require us to bow down when we are in such a situation. (90) God does not demand from a weak person feats that are beyond his strength, but demands humility. What does it mean that he demands? Not in the sense that God needs something from us, but in the sense that we must acquire spiritual qualities corresponding to the Kingdom of Heaven: patience, humility, obedience. If we do not have the strength to fast, if we are mentally weak, God will "invent" something else for us. For example, if God sees that a person is weak, struggles badly, but his soul is Christian, then He will send him a serious illness, bring him to such a state that he willy-nilly begins to fast. If he thanks God at the same time, he will receive the same benefit from illness as from feats. But patience, obedience, humility cannot be replaced by anything. If a person does not humble himself, endures nothing, murmurs, condemns his neighbors, no labors and feats, no sorrows, no illnesses will justify him before God. 114. All importance lies in humility. No matter how many prostrations you make, and you will dream of yourself, that I lead a cruel life, there is no use in these labors. (40) Everyone who leads a godly life, and especially who labors in the temple of God, should pay attention to these words. If we have such thoughts that I work hard for the Lord, I give all my strength and all my soul to the Church, then all this work of ours is completely devalued. If I accept such thoughts, it means that I am oriented towards earthly values, it means that my interests, my soul are turned to the earth. We must do good works for Christ's sake. But if it happens to accept thoughts of praise, then one must ask God for forgiveness and mercy, since we are saved not by works, but by God's mercy alone. When thoughts appear that praise us, we must know that if we do not drive them away from ourselves, then these seemingly innocent thoughts will be followed by carnal temptations, sinful actions, and then grievous falls. The Lord allows them to us in order to humble our pride. It is better, of course, not to bring things to a fall, but just to put up with it in a good way. But if you have already fallen, you need to repent immediately, and not despair. Despair is an even deeper fall. 115. There is no nearest and surest path to salvation than humility, and the greatest reward for him is who, being cruel in temper, brings himself to humility. (23) He will, of course, not without God's help. But truly, the worse a person's natural constitution is, as it were, the greater is the reward in the Kingdom of Heaven, if he nevertheless acquires the virtue of humility. It is necessary to distinguish between natural humility and Christian humility. There are people who are calm by nature, not inclined to self-assertion, who do not like to stand out. Such natural modesty is a given, there is no merit of a person in this, and accordingly, one should not expect a reward. In addition, in such people, natural humility often coexists with excessive pride. Christian humility is a deep heartfelt knowledge of one's weakness and sinfulness. There are people who are proud and arrogant by nature. It is not easy for them to struggle with their nature. Falling and rising, they build their humility at the cost of self-denial. In eternal life, such ascetics will receive a great reward. We are not able to recognize the real inner structure of the people around us and ourselves. The commandment "Judge not" is not just a prohibition, it is also an indication that we are deprived of true knowledge, that the depths of human hearts are hidden from us. Just as we do not see pride hiding under his natural quietness in one person, so we do not recognize his righteousness in another. It happens that a person stands out for his vanity, and people condemn him for pride. But they do not know that this man has already believed in Christ, has taken the path of repentance and has begun to find humility. Although external behavior by inertia may remain the same for some time. We see the surface, we judge the outward appearance, therefore our judgments are unrighteous. 116. "Blessed are the poor in spirit: for to them is the kingdom of heaven" (Matt. 5:3). A beggar, in the worldly way, is one who lacks the necessities of life, and we must recognize ourselves as poor in spirit, because we have nothing good. (77) Blessedness is promised to the poor by the Saviour Himself. Our trouble is that we all consider ourselves spiritually rich in the depths of our hearts. It would be good if we admit at least intellectually that we lack a lot of things. But if a person thinks of himself as spiritually rich, then this is simply the deepest delusion and a complete lack of spiritual experience. "With the poverty of virtue, spiritual poverty helps, which the Lord Himself blesses. We cannot ascend to the heights of virtues, let us descend into the depths of humility," wrote St. Macarius of Optina. If we lack good deeds and feats, humility can save us, confessing our insignificance before God. It is more pleasant for us to be temporarily proud in anticipation of eternal condemnation than to humble ourselves temporarily, in order to later enter the Kingdom of Heaven. Sometimes, in our minds, we understand that we lack much, but our hearts continue to remain in the pernicious conviction that we are spiritually rich. Such a disagreement between the mind and the heart gives rise to an inner struggle, an "invisible battle," which must be stubbornly, patiently, and courageously waged until the heart is completely cleansed of pride.

Part 2

117. God's teaching is this: "Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who do you harm" (328) The saints do so, as God commands. We will at least see what we are, we will humble ourselves and struggle with our passions, we will force ourselves to do good. One should not be embarrassed by such compulsion. The Holy Fathers write that at first compulsion is required, and then humility gradually appears, a person acquires grace and sincerely does good. 118. Standing before the Chalice of Communion, keep in mind what great Mystery you are approaching: "The Divine Fire sanctifies the worthy, and burns the unworthy" (350) It is wrong to think that we can be worthy of Communion in the full sense of the word. Whoever approaches the Holy Chalice with such a thought communes to his own condemnation. This is a sign of extreme pride, when a person thinks that he has already become on a par with God Himself, that he deserves Communion, that he almost does honor to God. Of course, no one speaks about this aloud, but sometimes he thinks to himself: "Here I am, I have read, read all the canons, all the prayers, fasted for a week, and now, purified and worthy, I am approaching the Holy Mysteries." This is a fairly common experience. People of this type, when they accidentally forget to read a line in a prayer or eat a piece of fish three days before Communion absent-mindedly, consider themselves unworthy of this sacrament. In fact, none of us is worthy of Communion. We become worthy when we approach the Holy Mysteries in humility, when we see our distance from God. From Communion we expect spiritual blessings, we hope to unite with God, to correct ourselves and to be purified. Of course, it is necessary to fulfill the rules established by the Church as much as possible, without them it is impossible to organize spiritual life; Self-willed rejection of them is a manifestation of pride. But do not flatter yourself. Even if you read ten, even a hundred canons, no matter how you "preen yourself" - you will not gain dignity through this. We approach God through humility. He who approaches the holy thing without reconciliation also partakes of the Holy Communion unworthily. A clear indication of our rejection of the Lord is when we are in a quarrel with someone, when in our hearts we rebel against someone, accuse someone, condemn someone. At such times, our indignant spirits make us enemies of God. 119. And in my life everything did not go according to my wishes. The intention was to live on Mount Athos - no, God did not bring it. I wanted to live with Fr. Paisius, with such a great elder, but no, and this did not happen. I should have been in China, and I had already submitted a petition - no, I had to be in St. Petersburg, a cell-attendant to the Metropolitan. I did not want to be a hierodeacon either, - how I asked for leave! He did not have time in this either. Then God brought me here. And how many times he refused the archimandrite! It is frightening even to think of going against the will of God. (414) By the way, the elder worked with great benefit in St. Petersburg. Together with the outstanding ascetic of piety, Metropolitan Gabriel of St. Petersburg, they restored monasteries. Theophan of Novoyezersk had many acquaintances among the great ascetics, he pointed them out to the metropolitan, who appointed them abbots of abandoned monasteries, and these monasteries began to flourish. And this is how man rejected his generally good desires before God. Out of humility he did not want to accept the priesthood, did not want high positions, but God nevertheless led him along this path, and he humbled his good will before God. And we don't really have a good will, we at least humble our evil will before God. In this regard, I recall the statement of Metropolitan Anthony of Sourozh about the humility of a clergyman. He spoke of how absurd it would have been for the donkey on which the Savior rode into Jerusalem to think that it was clothes spread under its feet and flowers were thrown. In the same way, a priest should think about himself, understanding that he does not deserve the place he occupies. 120. Christ the Son of God was obedient to the Father even unto death: such is the obedience! And not that I have suffered enough, for I lack more strength. Of course, it is not enough, if you do not ask God. (416) If we do not humble ourselves before God, then there will be no strength left at all. God takes away strength in order to humble us. It is embarrassing to pronounce such words that I hear from many people: they treat me unfairly, but I am tired, but I do not have this and that... The Holy Fathers never said anything like that. Self-pity rejects us from God. 121. What we use here as well, and we are unworthy of it. (266) When the demons suggest that someone has not honored us, that someone has neglected us, that someone has not given us what is due, we must remember that we are not entitled to anything. To judge fairly, we have already deserved eternal torment. Therefore, we must thank God that He spares us, waits for our repentance. Of course, if a person thinks that the Lord owes him something, that he himself, without God's help, has achieved, for example, a high position in society, created a good family, became a world champion, etc., there can be no question of gratitude. Man praises himself. Only a person who is aware of his weakness, his unworthiness before Him can sincerely thank God. 122. We ask the Lord: Do not deprive me of Thy heavenly blessings. He says: I am ready, learn from Me, that I am meek and humble in heart, be patient, be obedient, and you will receive the Kingdom of Heaven. (419) If we want God not to deprive us of His blessings, we must obey His commandments. We must learn from God, and not something beyond our strength, but to be meek and humble in heart. If this fails, how much more must we repent, and God in His mercy will not abandon us. For us, the cruel and proud, it is possible to become meek and humble only through voluntary podvigs or through the uncomplaining endurance of sorrows. There is no other way to make an unplaned board smooth than to cut it. In the same way, the Lord, in order for us to be worthy of the Kingdom of Heaven, scolds us. If we resist this, we will perish. We will die through our own fault. 123. When someone quarrels and a sister from the outside reminds or warns us, one must accept her words as from God, and not in such a way as to say, "What do you care?" You interfere in other people's affairs! (450) Often, for the sake of our passions, we distort the commandments of God, the instructions of the Holy Fathers. We often expect that our words should be perceived by others as spoken according to the will of God. In truth, we ourselves should try to be silent more, and if there is no special will of God for this, then we should not say anything to anyone. But when we are told, then we accept it with humility as the word of God. 124. In the monasteries in former times, those who guarded were considered benefactors. (450) It is evidently not a question of time. Pious people, seeking salvation, even now consider those who denounce them as benefactors. And vice versa, those who are looking for sweet and pleasant things in this life do not like those who make remarks to them. 125. There is no need to argue, there is no need to defend that I am not guilty. (452) That is, one should not justify oneself either to oneself or to people. At the same time, the Fathers teach that if someone else is hurt, if I am not the only one who is wronged, then in order for the innocent not to suffer, you need to say everything as it is. And if it concerns me alone, there is no need to argue. 126. In worldly life, there one justifies oneself, there one is proud; but here they humble themselves; this is a spiritual life, in every way contrary to worldly life... There is no need to justify oneself: there will be many words; And to say briefly: forgive me, I have sinned! That's how it ends. (452,453) People who seek salvation accept everything as from the hand of God. And people who do not care about their salvation, do not want and do not tolerate what God sends them, resist. Humility is much wiser in everyday life. When we are guilty of something, when we have been exposed, it is better to immediately admit our guilt than to try to justify ourselves. But there are different troubles. Some are sent to us by God, and others we arrange for ourselves. It is one thing when God, in order to cleanse me of passions, sends sorrows and illnesses that I must endure complacently, it is another thing if, say, I myself got angry with someone, quarreled with someone, insulted someone and thereby made an enemy for myself. Here I am to blame myself and must repent of those evil deeds because of which trouble haunts me. 127. "Learn from me, that I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest for your souls" (Matt. 11:29). There is no nearest and surest path to salvation than the path of humility. (462) Many Holy Fathers write that the path to rest is very simple, but we usually choose not it, but our own evil paths. It seems to us that we will acquire some things - and stop worrying, change our place of work - and calm down, people around us will become better - and we will have peace in our souls. All these are false expectations. The only way to peace of heart is to become like Christ in meekness and humility. The spiritual structure of modern man is such that the feats of the ancient ascetics are beyond his strength. We do not have enough will, patience, health for this, and if we do, then we are let down by frivolity - we too easily succumb to empty demonic deceptions. But although not all people are capable of feats, all are capable of getting sick and enduring misfortunes. And God sends them to us, all that remains is to voluntarily accept them. This will be counted for us instead of a feat. In addition, generosity eases burdens, it also encourages God to strengthen us in bearing sorrows, to send us spiritual consolations. 128. Even now there are miracle-workers, here they are: humble, patient, and meek, who drive away the enemy's pretenses, who observe purity of soul and body; they will not want miracles. (323) When a man becomes worthy to receive some lofty gifts from God, he usually finds that he himself does not desire it at all. From the Otechnik we learn about how the saints treated the gifts of God that they possessed. As, for example, Pimen the Great resurrected the dead and was grieved. This is the correct, Christian attitude to gifts. And once a sick boy was brought to Pimen the Great, but they knew that the elder would humbly refuse to heal him. Pimen was overwhelmed with love, and this love gave him the strength to heal, but there was no vanity in him, and he, realizing that God could heal without him, wanted to withdraw. Then Pimen had to be deceived. The elders began to bless the boy in turn, then they said to Pimen: "Bless you too." He began to refuse. They persuade: "It's inconvenient - we blessed everything, you bless it too." Pimen blessed - and the boy was immediately healed. 129. One sister wanted to leave the convent in order to calm the others and to calm herself down. (328) This is Satan's thought under the guise of good: they don't love me, I'm a burden to them. Satan inspires such falsely good thoughts: if people are annoyed with me, I will leave so that it will be quiet and calm. Demons infect us with this hypocrisy. There is no need to listen to these thoughts. The Holy Fathers are unanimous in their opinion that we must leave those places where we stand on the verge of falling, where mortal sins threaten us. Not from where people sin, but from where we are tempted and we feel that we may not be able to resist. You have to flee from such places. And if we are in a place where we observe irritation in ourselves, we must humble ourselves, learn patience, reproach ourselves, but do not leave this place. To seek a place where nothing would irritate us, where everything would be pleasant for us, is to seek our own destruction. One young man came to the elder and said: "Father, I prayed to God that the passions would leave me, and now I feel peace in my soul." "Madman," the elder answered, "go and pray that your passions may return to you! As long as they were in you, you humbled yourself." And he went, prayed, and the salvific, humbling actions of the passions returned to him. If the passions are silenced in us, we can imagine ourselves almost saints. But how will this "holiness" end? The Last Judgment will come, everything will be revealed as it is, and it will be too late to correct it. That is why we do not need to flee from temptations, we need them, through them we come to know our weakness, humble ourselves and gain the possibility of repentance and salvation. 130. Whoever worthily receives the Body of Christ, the Son of God, is higher than a miracle-worker. (323) If we partake of Communion with complete humility, with full hope in God's mercy, with full awareness of our unworthiness, but with a desire to unite with Christ, we will receive a much greater benefit than we would receive from miracles, even our own.

Love

Without love we will not see God * Passionate love is displeasing to the Lord * Love that deprives us of freedom is sinful * It is not our neighbors who are obliged to love us, but we who love them * Whether we love God becomes clear in suffering * Worldly attachments are our weakness * To hate in order to love * It is possible to betray God in thought * How to love relatives * If we are at enmity with each other, we are called Christians in vain * We are not forcibly driven to the Kingdom of Heaven * A kind word from an evil heart * Those who are at war do not have the right to take communion * Hatred is equal to murder * Others can be taught by those who are called to do so by God * Do not multiply sins by idle talk * 131. Without God's love, without peace with our neighbors, we will not be vouchsafed to see God. (7) Just as gangrene occurs on an arm or a leg, so dislike for one's neighbor is gangrene of our soul. If we are not cured of this disease with God's help, we will be cut off from the eternal Body of the Church. 132. "Whosoever cometh unto Me, and hates not his father, and mother, and wife, and children, and brethren and sisters, and also his own soul, he cannot be My disciple" (Luke 14:26). From your letter it is evident that you are very fond of your sister; this is not in accordance with the teaching of Christ our Saviour. (85) Fervent human love does not agree with the teaching of the Saviour. And it is clear why. It is said in the Old Testament, and Christ confirmed this commandment: "Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, with all thy mind, with all thy soul." With all my heart. And if our heart is given to people, then we are clearly violating the first commandment of God. 133. Love her [your sister] and be freer from your love, so that you do not prefer her to the love of God. Human love brings little benefit to our souls; but love for God fulfills everything, and is an eternal gain. (85) Love should make a person free. If love deprives you of freedom, then this is already sinful love. It is not said: do not love. Love, but do not be enslaved to human love. Human love should not block God from us. If we love a person as the image of God, then we come to know God even more, our love for Him increases. And if our attachment to a person, to a deed, or to a thing distracts us from God, then such attachment is sinful. True love for one's neighbor appears when we fulfill the first commandment, then only we can truly fulfill the second: "Love your neighbor as yourself." 134. Love God above all else, and do not seek human love; when we love God with all our heart and soul, then we will love one another; and without God's love, human love will be in vain. (347) Whether we love God is not determined when He sends us consolation, but when there are no such consolations. And this is true in human relations. When a husband never ceases to please his wife - how can you not love him? It's quite another thing when he lies paralyzed and at the same time scolds. It is here that the measure of our love is revealed. Hope for human relationships, for all earthly attachments, is a false hope. Worldly people are bound together by many ties, by many feelings. But it's one thing to have these feelings, it's another thing to count on them, to see them as the support of your life. In essence, worldly attachments are our weakness. It is necessary to come to terms with it. But to give oneself entirely to these feelings, to consider them as some kind of dignity, and even more so to be exalted by them, means to sin, instead of salvific humility to acquire destructive pride. 135. We should not think whether they love us or not; or better to think that she is not worthy to be loved. Love everyone yourself, because we are not told to be loved, but we are commanded to love everyone. (192) We have been given the commandment, "Love the Lord God with all your heart and your neighbor as yourself." It is said: love! And we, through our cunning, distort this commandment and substitute in its place another, self-willed one: "All must love one another." But it is one thing to think that I should love all my neighbors, and another thing is that everyone should love each other. It follows that everyone should love me. We are very concerned about who treats us. When someone does not love us, we are not only offended or angry, we also condemn the person. But the commandment of love is addressed to each person personally, so that he, without demanding love for himself, would love another himself. It is not us who are obliged to love, but we are obliged to love our neighbors, and the Lord God will judge other people for how they treat us. 136. If your heart is unyielding to the love of those who are hostile to us, then pray: "Lord! Soften the hardness, the cruelty, and the hardness of my heart." (194) If we don't love our neighbors, we need to know that it's about ourselves. If we had a loving heart, we would love everyone, we could not help loving. If we do not love someone, it means that our heart is actually empty, and our so-called love is passionate attachment. Our natural, God-given feeling of love has been defiled by the fall of Adam and Eve, poisoned by pride. This is how we inherit it at birth. As long as we are more fond of people who praise us, who console us, and not those who insult and offend us, our love remains a carnal, passionate feeling. We should not take our human attachments (even good, even natural) to husbands, wives, and friends for the spiritual love that is spoken of in God's commandment. 137. Those who have no concern for worldly life and do not cling to love any person stand closer to the throne of God. (340) Not to have any earthly attachments is the measure of great ascetics. But it should be an ideal for us. The soul of every person is the bride of Christ, and God demands faithfulness from every soul, so that we do not cling to anything or anyone except God. Love for one's neighbor does not mean passionate love, but sacrificial love, in the likeness of Christ's love. And we must become completely attached to God. "Hate completely, that you may love perfectly. Move away completely, in order to come completely closer" - these are the words of St. Barsanuphius the Great. Only by completely hating sin can one truly love God and one's neighbor. Only by withdrawing from the passions can one truly draw near to God. 138. Instead of God, we turn with love to temporal things; we leave God, and cling to creation, we occupy our thoughts with vain things. (495) According to the commandment, we must love God, our heart must be given to God, but we betray it because we are heartily attached to various created things. It happens, we get attached to people, it happens, to some objects, to some activities. One should not think that betrayal of God is only something crudely bodily, when a person, for example, robs, fornicates, drinks vodka. The Elder writes: "We occupy our thoughts with vain things." This means that we can betray God even in thought, and this is already enough for our destruction. "Whoever loves father or mother more than I am unworthy of Me, and whoever loves son or daughter more than I am unworthy of Me." These words of the Gospel are usually perceived with some kind of inner resistance. Love for relatives is an example of the strongest earthly human love. The commandment is not to love God a hundred times more than we love mom and dad, it means a qualitative difference – nothing can be put on a par with God, and any earthly love is given to us as a prototype of love for God. Without loving God alone, it is impossible to be with God. The words are heavy, terrible for us, who have loved so much on earth. God occupies only a small place in our minds, and He has almost no place in our hearts. Christ says that he who renounces everything will gain everything. Whoever rejects passionate love, renounces attachment to loved ones, frees his heart. It is as if the shackles fall from it, and then it expands. The Apostle Paul writes about this: "Our heart is enlarged. You are not cramped in us..." (2 Corinthians 6:11-12). Such a heart is able to accommodate everyone. True love for one's neighbor is acquired, pure and holy, which embraces everyone, including relatives, of course. 139. If we become addicted to food or clothing, this will be idolatry... Try only to love God and to cling to Him alone. (495) God's place in our souls is occupied by various perishable things. We experience many things precisely as a source of good for us, a source of consolation. But the true source of good is only the eternal God. The temporary always deceives us. We attach our souls to people - they die, we attach ourselves to occupations - they disappear, or cease to interest us, or we lose the ability to engage in them. We build our own houses, buy things, cook food... Everything is eaten, lived, broken, and in the end we ourselves disappear, usually before what we have accumulated. But if we cling to God in soul and heart, and not to the perishable world, then we will have good and consolation on earth, and bliss in eternity. 140. There is no worse thing in monasteries than discord, contradiction, and contempt for others. (432) And not only in monastic cloisters, but in general there is nothing worse than discord, contradiction, and contempt for others. No matter how much we hang ourselves with crosses, no matter how much we take communion, if we do not overcome malice and self-will, if we despise each other, then we call ourselves Christians in vain. 141. When we are in disobedience, in disobedience, in strife among ourselves, the Lord God cannot be with us... And where in the monastery they lead a peaceful life, pleasing to the Lord, there are angels. (434, 435) God, He is humble, He is meek, and has nothing in common with us when we murmur and are angry - He quietly departs from us. This is also the case in human communication. A gentle, delicate, noble person cannot stand a rough environment, he imperceptibly leaves it. In the same way, God leaves us with our malice. He does not forcibly remake us, He does not forcibly draw us into the Kingdom of Heaven. If we do not correct ourselves in this temporal life, then we will remain forever alone with our selfishness, with our malice. 142. It is possible to warn the sinner for the sake of the common good; whether he accepts the warning or not, as long as he does not say it out of malice, with humility, for the salvation of the soul of his neighbor. (449) Why does a seemingly kind word often only irritate a person? Because it is spoken from an evil heart. 143. If anyone is angry or at enmity with his sister, he is not worthy to go to church or to offer prayer to the Lord. (460) If a man is at enmity with someone in his soul, then his prayer is imputed to him as a sin, and he has no right to receive Communion. Although sin, at a superficial glance, is small and, it would seem, cannot be compared with fornication, murder, or robbery, but before God, unrepentant hatred is equal to murder. Underestimation of mental sins occurs for two reasons. Firstly, society does not punish for them. A criminal thought, until it has become a word or a deed, is not subject to the criminal code, and in general, people, not knowing our thoughts, do not condemn us for them. Secondly, it is easier to repent of mental sins than of sins committed by deed. Hence the illusion of innocence and non-punishment. A sinful thought seems to be something harmless. However, God's judgment is carried out according to a different code. The Lord has proclaimed this through the Gospel, and we are all warned that we will be judged for our thoughts as well as for our deeds. 144. How will I pray to Him when I do not listen to Him? (460) This is not a question of human weaknesses, but of what a person prefers: the commandment of God or his own malice. If he consciously chooses malice, admits that he has the right to be offended by people, to consider them guilty, then he is consciously going against God. 145. We should love Him more than fear Him; demons are afraid; if there is no love in us, then we also become like them. (21) We do not have the saving fear of God, but the fear that the demons have. It is said about them: "Demons believe and tremble," that is, they have hopeless fear. So we are usually possessed by such fear. We fear God, but we do not believe that we can be saved. We are very often, unnoticed by ourselves, in a state of despair, and therefore we fall into such spiritual despondency that we think, if it is impossible to be saved, then at least now we will have a piece of it, and we plunge into the vanity of life. In fact, you need to fear God, but not fall into despair. And do everything we can for our salvation. 146. "And woe to you, lawyers, because you lay burdens on people that are unbearable, and you yourselves do not touch them with one finger" (Luke 11:46). That is, you force people and confuse their conscience, force them to do what you cannot do yourself. The most common phenomenon is mutual teaching. We, who have not yet touched the practice of God's commandments, love to teach others. We have such coldness towards God that, to be honest, we almost do not know Him and almost never remember Him, what kind of love is there. We do not fulfill the commandment of love for God, nor the commandment of love for one's neighbor, but from morning to evening we teach each other, each to the extent of his poor understanding. Whoever imagines himself to be a spiritual person teaches in spiritual things, and those who do not know about inner things teach about external things: how to stand in church, how to light a candle... But it is clear that only those who are called to do so by God (priests in church, bosses at work, parents at home) can teach others, or a person must have a special grace of God or a special love for his neighbor when he is ready to lay down his life for him. Then you can convert the whole city to Christianity by love. Once upon a time, St. Gregory of Neocaesarea came to the city of Neocaesarea, where there were seventeen Christians. And a few years later, seventeen pagans remained there. By his love, by his prayer, Saint Gregory attracted the grace of God, which converted people to Christ, and they were united by love. I am a sinful man, but if I do not preach from the ambo, then my sins will only multiply from this. It's the same with parents. If they do not bring up their children out of false humility, this is a sin. Everyone in his place is obliged to teach. And if we are not appointed to teach, if we are not overwhelmed with love and humility, then it is better for us to be silent, so as not to multiply our sins with empty talk. 147. You say in prayer, "Our Father!" If He is the Father, He cares for you. Rather, he says, the mother will forget the fiend, but I will not forget you. My Creator! The baby runs to his mother! And we are moving away from You! (409) We should treat God as loving children treat a loving mother, but we, like madmen, run away from Him. And even the almighty Lord can do nothing if we willfully leave Him and depart from the path of His commandments.

Prayer

Part 1