Answer. If avarice prevents you from giving your neighbor what he needs, then consider what you have. When you have a lot of things, give a little more than you should, and when you have little, give exactly as much as you should. May God enlighten your heart, brother.

Question 333. When I see a vessel needed for a hospital, and I feel that I have an addiction to it, will I not give food to my passion by taking it?

John's answer. If you have need of a vessel and the thought of it struggles with you, then say to your thought: "I need it, but why take it on a whim?" but if it does not cease, then, when it is convenient to get by with another vessel, do not take and suppress your addiction; and if necessary, take that vessel, reproaching yourself and saying, "If necessity did not compel it, I would not take it, because I was overcome by my lust."

Question 334. A man once gave me clothes, and I took them then, as if with joy, without contradicting them in the least; but, examining myself, I found that I had taken it not out of necessity, but rather out of covetousness, and the thought said to me: "Return it." What do you command me to do?

John's answer. From the bottom of our hearts let us praise the giver and heartily blaspheme the one who received it, and let us bear it with humility, condemning ourselves, and in the future let us guard against covetousness.

Question 335 of the same. If it happens that someone wants to give me a thing that I need, but I see that my heart desires to receive it out of passion, what should I do: should I take it out of need, or refuse it because of addiction to it?

John's answer. As about food, so be it wise. You know that we need food every day, but we should not eat it with pleasure. When we receive it, thanking God, who gave it, and condemning ourselves as unworthy, then God makes it serve us for sanctification and blessing. Therefore, if you are in need of any thing and have time to receive it, thank God who helps you, and condemn yourself as unworthy, and God will turn away your addiction, for to Him all things are possible... nothing is impossible for Him (Mk. 10:27; Job 10:13). To Him be the glory forever, Amen. [94]

Question 336. Another brother asked the same Elder: Since the Lord gave the commandment to love one's neighbor as oneself, and to sympathize with him in joy and sorrow, as a member of one's own body, and whoever sees him in poverty and despises him would violate love, even if he himself had only one necessary thing, which is insufficient for himself, then tell me, my father, in what does love appear?

John's answer. Love for one's neighbor is manifested in many forms and not only by almsgiving. Thus, for example: when you go somewhere with your neighbor and see that your mind desires to be honored more than your brother, and you do not desire above all that he should be honored on an equal footing with you, then you do not love him as yourself, for the Apostle says: "One another's honor is greater for themselves" (Phil. 2:3). When you have something to eat, and you see that your thought inspires you to eat in private, on a whim, without need, then you do not love your neighbor as yourself. When you have something you need, barely enough for you alone, and you do not share it with your neighbor, then you do not love him as yourself. If we wish to fulfill the word of Scripture in this case, it will not protect us, for it is not written about one person, but each person is called our neighbor. How can this be done in relation to all people, without having something to give to everyone? And likewise, to desire to love one's neighbor as oneself also means the following: when it happens to suffer some kind of loss, and you see that your thoughts delight in the fact that your neighbor has suffered a loss incomparably greater than you, then you do not love him as yourself. Likewise, when you see that he is praised, and do not rejoice with him, because you were not praised with him, and do not think, as you ought to think, that my brother's praise also applies to me, for he is one of my members, then in this case you did not try to love him as yourself; — the same in everything else. To love your neighbor as yourself also means that if you hear something from your fathers about the way of God, and your brother asks you about it, you will not hide from him what is useful, out of envy. But knowing that he is your brother, tell him with the fear of God what you have heard, and do not consider yourself a teacher, for it is not profitable for you.

Question 337. Is it good to have friendship with a peer?

Answer. It is good not to have special friendship with any of your peers, for such a custom does not allow you to acquire weeping; likewise, do not have friendship with anyone who deprives you of weeping: it will not benefit you, but rather harm; for no one can acquire anything good except with great difficulty. Train your eyes not to look at anyone too intently, and you will not fill your heart with fierce insolence, which destroys all the fruits of a monk.

Question 338 of the same. When I hear about someone that he is in battle or in sickness, and as if I have compassion for him, then tell me, first of all: does such compassion come from the demons, who want to distract me from the remembrance of my own sins? Then, should I remember him in prayer, when I myself am in even greater trouble and greater sins, while that brother asks me for this, or wants me to tell one of the fathers about it? Does not prayer for one's neighbor teach love and a passionate person, at least several? How do you judge this, my father?

John's answer. The words of the Fathers: "No one should leave his dead man and go to mourn for another," refer to the young, for it is characteristic of the perfect to have compassion for their neighbor. If a young man shows compassion to another, this is a mockery of the demons, for he senselessly considers him sick and in need, and thinks of himself that he is doing a good deed, as it were; it is much more useful for him not to care about anything else at all. And if he remembers him in his heart or hears about him from others, let him say: "May God have mercy on me and him!" In order to avoid this, only remind that so-and-so is in sorrow, and the Elder, having heard, will pray with all earnestness for him who is weak in spirit. And when someone asks you to tell the elder about this, then for the sake of the commandment say: "Pray, father, for so-and-so." And if he says to you, "Pray for me," then also for the sake of the commandment say, "Lord! Forgive us", or: "God! Help us," or, "Cover us in this matter," and do not think that you are doing this of your own free will, for you have asked about it and heard how it should be said. And in order to have compassion for someone, even out of love, you have not yet come to this measure. When you are troubled by a thought about something, then ask the Elder and you will hear what you need to do. May God have mercy on you, brother!

Question 339 of the same. Tell me, my father: to what extent should the measure of mutual love of a brother for another extend?