On Hearing and Doing
There is a bold passage in one spiritual writer, I think it is Mark the Ascetic, where he says: "If God comes before you and says: 'Do this or that' – and your heart cannot answer 'Amen!' – do not do it, because God does not need your action, He needs your heart.
This is what we should think about and how to translate the words of the prayer Thy will be done. Yes! Let it be in me too! Let my will be so united with Yours that when You desire something, it would also be my desire, that there would be no conflict, no conflict or conflict between our wills, so that Your will and mine would be like a harmony between two musical notes, so that there would be unity between Your will and mine... And this is the task that we must solve by reading, by reading the Holy Scriptures, by reading what Christ has revealed in Himself and said about what a real man is. And then we can grow into this measure.
Talk at the Christmas Retreat, January 4, 1986
On the practice of "communion" in the London parish, see "To Be Orthodox in England" at the present time. Collection
The Call of God and the Path of Salvation
Every year it seems to me more and more difficult to say something new at our retreats; for so many years we have lived one, common church life, for so many years we have been sharing feelings and thoughts, for so many years we have been hearing the same Gospel readings and growing into them together, that it seems that I can only repeat what has been said so many times.
And at the same time, if we think about what fruit we have brought over the years of our lives from the fact that we have heard the words of God Himself, who became Man, then we have to admit: No! It is necessary to say the same thing over and over again.. And it is necessary to speak, and especially to accept in one's own heart, that the Lord is calling, praying, persuading us, demanding – and we remain so insensitive and deaf. We are accustomed even to such terrible things as the story of Christ's crucifixion: when we hear it, in the depths of our souls something tells us: Yes, but He has risen.. – and therefore the horror of this event, the darkness of the terrible night of Good Friday, barely reach our consciousness, our feelings.
When I say "us", I am thinking of all of us and of myself in the first place. When I first read the Gospel, I was shaken to the depths of my soul, to the very depths of my being; it seemed that now that I knew this, all life should be different; It is impossible to live as everyone else lives! And looking back on my life, I realize with pain that although this feeling has not been extinguished, life has not changed to such an absolute extent as it could and should have changed.