Book One 1

Book Two 10

Book Three 13

Book Four 18

Book Five 23

Book Six 29

Book Seven 37

Book Eight 39

Book Nine 45

Book Ten 51

Book Eleven 61

Book Twelve 66

Book Thirteen 72

Book One

"Great art Thou, O Lord, and worthy of praise in all things; great is Thy power, and immeasurable is Thy wisdom." And man, a particle of Thy creatures, wants to glorify Thee; a man who carries his mortality with him everywhere, carries with him the testimony of his sin and the testimony that Thou art "against the proud." And yet man, a particle of Thy creatures, wants to glorify Thee. Thou dost delight us with this doxology, for Thou hast created us for Thyself, and our heart knows no rest until it rests in Thee. Let me, O Lord, know and comprehend whether to begin by calling upon Thee or by glorifying Thee; whether it is necessary first to know Thee or to call upon Thee. But who will call upon Thee without knowing Thee? It is not to Thee that he who does not know can call upon Thee, but to someone else. Or is it necessary to "call upon Thee" in order to know Thee? "How shall they call upon Him in Whom they have not believed? And how can they believe Thee without a preacher? And those who seek Him will praise the Lord." Those who seek will find Him, and those who find Him will praise Him. I will seek Thee, O Lord, calling upon Thee, and I will call upon Thee, believing in Thee, for in Thee it has been preached to us. My faith cries out to Thee, O Lord, which Thou hast given me, which Thou hast breathed into me through Thy incarnate Son, through the ministry of Thy Confessor.

But how shall I call upon my God, to God and my Lord? When I call upon Him, I will call Him into myself. Where is the place in me where my Lord would come? Where will the Lord come in me, the Lord who created heaven and earth? O Lord my God! Is there anything in me that can contain You? Do the heavens and the earth, which Thou hast made, and in which Thou hast created me, contain Thee? But without You, there would be nothing that exists, so everything that exists contains You? But I also exist; why do I ask Thee to come to me: I would not be if Thou hadst not been in me. For I am not yet in hell, though Thou art there. And "if I go down to hell, you are there." I wouldn't be there, my God, I wouldn't be there at all, if You weren't in me. No, rather, I would not exist if I were not in You, "from Whom are all things, through Whom are all things, in Whom are all things." Truly so, Lord, truly so. Where shall I call Thee, if I am in Thee? And whence wilt thou come to me? Where, beyond earth and heaven, shall I go, that my Lord may come to me from thence to me? Who said, "Heaven and earth are full of Me"?

And so, do heaven and earth contain Thee, if Thou fillest them? Or do You fill them and something else remains in You, for they do not contain You? And where does this remnant of Yours pour out when heaven and earth are full? Or You don't need a container. To Thee, Who contains all things, for what Thou fillest Thou fillest by containing? It is not the vessels full of Thee that give Thee stability: let them be broken. You won't spill out. And when Thou pours out into us, it is not Thou who falls, but we are raised up by Thee; Thou art not scattered, but we are gathered together by Thee. And everything that You fill, You fill everything with Yourself. But surely everything is not able to contain Thee, it contains only a part of Thee, and all at once contain the same part? Or individual creatures – separate parts: the larger ones, the smaller smaller ones? So, is one part in You greater and the other less? Or are Thou whole everywhere, and nothing can contain Thee as a whole?

What then art thou, O my God? What if not the Lord God? "Who is the Lord besides the Lord? And who is God but our God?" The Highest, the Most Gracious, the Mighty, the Almighty, the Most Merciful, and the Most Just; the Most Distant and the Closest, the Most Beautiful and the Strongest, the Immovable and the Incomprehensible; Unchanging, Changing all things, eternally Young and eternally Old, Thou renews all things and makes the proud old, and they know it not; eternally in action, eternally at rest, gathering and not needing, carrying, filling and covering; create, nourish and improve; you seek, although you have everything. You love and do not worry; you are jealous and not anxious; you repent and do not grieve; you are angry and remain calm; you change your works, and do not change your counsel; you pick up what you find and never lose; you are never in need and rejoice in profit; You are never stingy and demand interest. It is given to you in abundance that you may be in debt, but does anyone have anything that is not yours? You pay your debts, but you owe no one; you pay off your debts without losing anything. What more can I say, my Lord, my Life, my Holy Joy? And what can we say about You? But woe to them. who are silent about Thee, for even the pure are dumb.

Who will let me rest in You? Who will allow Thou to enter into my heart and make it drunk, so that I may forget all my evil and embrace my only good, Thee? What are You to me? Have pity on me and let me speak. What am I to Thee, that Thou commandest me to love Thee, and that Thou art angry if I do not do this, and that Thou threatest me with great misfortunes? Is it not a great misfortune not to love You? Woe is me! Tell me in Thy mercy, O Lord my God, what art Thou for me? "Say unto my soul, I am thy salvation." Speak so that I can hear. Behold the ears of my heart before Thee, O Lord: open them, and say unto my soul, I am thy salvation. Do not hide Thy face from me: I will die, I will not die, but let me see him.

Strait is the house of my soul, that Thou mayest enter there: enlarge it. It is collapsing, renew it. There is something in it with which to offend Thy gaze: I confess, I know, but who will take it away? And to whom else but Thee shall I exclaim: "Cleanse me from my secret sins, O Lord, and deliver Thy servant from those who tempt." I believe and therefore I say: "Lord, Thou knowest." Have I not testified before Thee "against myself of my transgressions, O my God? And thou hast forgiven the iniquities of my heart." I do not argue with You, Who is the Truth, and I do not want to lie to myself, lest my iniquity lie to myself. No, I do not judge You, for "If You look upon iniquities, O Lord, Lord, who can stand?"