Lives of Saints. March

Такой великий муж, сподобившийся благодати Божией, впал, однако, в тяжкое прегрешение. Это произошло, вероятно, потому, что он стал много думать о своей святости и богоугодной жизни и считать себя великим подвижником. Начало его падения было таково. Исконной враг рода человеческого, диавол, завидующий проводящим жизнь богоугодно и непрестанно копающий для них ров погибели, вошел в отроковицу, дочь одного богача, и стал мучить ее, призывая её устами имя Иакова и говоря:

- Не войду из неё, если не отведете меня к Иакову пустыннику.

Родители отроковицы, взявши ее, ходили с нею по монастырям и пустыням долгое время, отыскивая святого отца Иакова. Найдя, наконец, его, они пали к ногам его и стали умолять его:

- Помилуй нашу дочь, ибо она сильно страдает от нечистого духа; вот уже двадцатый день, как она не принимает ни пищи, ни питья, но, испуская вопли, терзает себя и призывает твое имя.

Святой, став на молитву, столь усердно помолился о ней Богу, что даже самое место, где он стоял, потряслось. По окончании молитвы Иаков дунул на отроковицу и сказал нечистому духу:

- Именем Господа нашего Иисуса Христа повелеваю тебе: выйди из сей отроковицы.

И тотчас диавол, как бы опалённый огнём, вышел из девицы. Она же упала на землю и долгое время оставалась безгласною. Но святой Иаков снова помолился Богу, взял ее за руку и, подняв с земли, отдал её родителям. Те, видя такое чудо, прославили Бога. Но опасаясь, как бы опять не возвратился к ней нечистый дух, они умоляли святого, дабы он позволил дочери их остаться у него на три дня, пока совершенно не выздоровеет. И осталась отроковица у старца, а родители её ушли домой.

When the maiden remained with Saint James, the devil, seeing that the saint was in a desolate solitary place together with the maiden, and finding that the most opportune time had come for his intrigues, raised up upon the ascetic a storm of impure thoughts and vile carnal lust, and so kindled his lust, that the holy man, the same one who had not previously been caught by the temptation of the prostitute sent to him by the Samaritans, the one with whom he burned his hand in the fire for the sake of preserving chastity and purity, the one who performed many miracles and cast out demons, was so inflamed by fornication that, forgetting the fear of God and his many years of fasting and the grace and power of healing sent to him from God, being already in venerable old age, he was defeated by the devil and fell. He raped the maiden, corrupted her and his virginity, and, having defiled her body and soul, ruined all his previous fasting labors. It was not enough for him to commit one sin, and he added to it an even more grievous one. Just as one who slips from a mountain flies down, falling from stone to stone and breaking, so it happened to St. James: having committed one great sin, he fell into another, greater and more cruel, aggravating iniquity with iniquity. The enemy aroused fear in him, and he began to think: the maiden will now tell her parents that I have raped her and that I will be ashamed and reproached, and I will be in great trouble because of her. Succumbing to the instigation of the demons, he killed an innocent maiden, thinking to hide his sin from people and avoid disgrace. But he did not stop there, but gave himself over to sin even more: for the body of the maiden, which he desecrated and killed without mercy with his own hand, he did not give up to the usual burial in the ground, but threw it into the river. Such is the fruit of prideful self-conceit, for if this monk had not considered himself holy and great in virtue, then he would not have fallen into such cruel sins, and the enemy would not have mocked the old age of him who in his youth had once conquered his tricks.

After this, the devil began to bring Jacob down as a bound prisoner into the last pit of perdition, into the most grievous of all sins, into the despair of Cain and Judas. The elder, sitting in his cell, did not know what remained for him to do. Strongly rebuked by his conscience, sighing and giving way to despair, he no longer dared to open his mouth for prayer, nor to turn his mind to God. He decided to flee to some other distant country and, leaving monasticism, settle in the world, and in his old age serve the world and the devil. Coming out of the cave, he quickly set out on his journey, driven and agitated by despair, like a violent storm of the sea,

But the great, immeasurable, and humane goodness of Christ, by which the sins of the whole world cannot be overcome, desiring that all people should be saved and that not one of them should perish, did not abandon this lost elder, did not allow the demons to rejoice in his destruction to the end, but, according to its unspeakable destinies, arranged for him to rise from the fall and renewal. For when he set out on his journey, he saw a monastery on the road, entering which he greeted the hegumen with the brethren. They offered him to eat bread, but he did not want to hear about it, and only sighed often and heavily. When the brethren begged him to refresh himself with food, he said to them:

"Woe to me, accursed! How dare I raise my eyes to the sky? how dare I call upon the name of Christ, Whom I have offended? and how shall I touch His gifts, being a fornicator and a murderer?

Then he confessed before everyone in order everything that had happened to him. The hegumen and the brethren, hearing his confession, were troubled and, sympathizing with him, began to console him, so that he would not give way to despair, but, having repented, he would accept an epitimia for his sins. For a long time they begged Jacob to stay with them, but he did not listen to them and departed into the world. For a long time he wandered in the wilderness. Finally, by the will of God, a certain divinely inspired man met him and asked the elder to turn away from the path and enter his cell. Having persuaded Jacob, he brought him to himself, washed his feet, and offered him the food that he had, asking him to eat it. But James, rebuked and tormented by his conscience, often sighed from the depths of his heart and beat his breast, not even wanting to touch the food. Then the man fell down at Jacob's feet, comforted him, and with an oath said that he would not rise from the ground until the elder agreed to partake of the food offered. When Jacob agreed, the monk rose from the ground, and they both partook of the meal, which is possible in the wilderness. After partaking of the food, both got up, thanked God, and sat down again. Then the desert-dweller said to Jacob:

- Father, give me instruction for the benefit of the soul, teach me as your son about Christ, and strengthen my heart, because I am often and greatly disturbed by various thoughts.

Jacob wept mightily and, weeping inconsolable tears and beating his breast, said: