Мая 16/28 епископ пишет: «В Какогава побудьте и литургию там совершите. Ходите по христианам с катехизатором. Узнать мнение христиан о катехизаторе вообще довольно трудно: японцы не очень откровенны. Если уж очень надоест им катехизатор, они жалуются на него; но тогда уж только держись – наговорят столько, что катехизатора хоть смертью казни; и это сделают без катехизатора, искусно отведут тебя в сторону, или на гору, или еще куда в уединенное место.

В Какогава и Химедзи едва ли так поступят. А нужно догадаться. Например, при катехизаторе у всех христиан взять метрику в руки и по ней проверить всех христиан; добрый катехизатор расскажет тут же все, что нужно; про отсутствующих поведает, кто куда переселился и прочее; нерадивый отзывается незнанием, а отвечают за него христиане. Тут же по метрике вы увидите, есть ли плоды служения сего катехизатора или нет. Если нет, то спрашивайте при всех: а что же вы делали доселе? Как проводите ваше время? Часто ли посещаете христиан? И если нет у вас слушателей из язычников, учите ли по крайней мере христиан? Их детей? Все ли дети у вас в церкви знают молитвы? Да тут же и испытаете детей. И так далее. Из всего в совокупности и выведете очень ясное представление о том – хорош катехизатор или нет. Так вообще. Так и об Адаци».

А сегодня я как раз пригласил катехизатора Павла и с ним стал просматривать метрику. О многих он совсем не имеет никакого понятия – куда подевались они, а может быть, даже и в Осака, да не знает, в каком углу. Некоторых семей совсем не знает состава и кто как кому приходится. О некоторых совсем даже удивлялся, когда я называл имя члена в той или другой семье. А относительно того, кто исповедался или нет, нечего и толковать. Я ему и сделал замечание, что так нельзя; нужно наставлять христиан на путь благочестия, а вы не знаете, где и взять христиан-то, а если знаете, то не знаете – что ему нужно, чего ему особенно недостает. После я об этом и еще посерьезнее поговорю с ним. Оказывается, из всех здешних христиан за на стоящий год не исповедалось больше 60 человек. Впрочем, нужно сделать оговорку: у отца Сергия не отмечены некоторые несомненно причащавшиеся; это тоже небрежность отца Сергия, о чем я и скажу ему после, разобравши все. Действительно и правда, как говорит отец А. С–ий, с чем согласен и Преосвященный, что у нас христиане в общем лучше катехизаторов: христиане с радостью, например, меня встречают и с вниманием выслушивают мои мало понятные им глаголы, а катехизаторы равнодушно относятся к своему делу и, очевидно, только теперь при мне подтягиваются на проповедь, ибо чем же объяснить такую халатность, как не прежним небрежением о сем деле? Но теперь и я с ними немного иначе буду поступать и буду понукать на дело, как ленивых людей.

За бдение собралось человек 20; у меня все время была на сердце перед Богом молитва о том, чтобы Он Сам помог мне сделать Его святое дело во славу Его святого Имени, чтобы Он подал мне и моим помощникам ревность и силу, да и мудрость, а главное – облагодатил всякое наше слово и дело, чтобы воистину во всем нашем являлась Его всесильная благодать, да познают все Его Единого. Это теперь у меня постоянно на сердце. И действительно, весьма и весьма много дела предлежит нам; иногда не знаю, с чего и начать, так много всего, что нужно вот сейчас же и сделать. Но Бог поможет. Он видит мое искреннее желание трудиться на том деле, к которому призвал меня.

Под неделю Святых Отец за бдение собрались, хотя не особенно много; а сегодня за обедню набралось и порядочно, человек 40, а может быть, и больше того. На собрании после обедни я говорил о той опасности, какая угрожала от ереси Ария: простой человек нас спасти не мог, а только Сын Божий, Который действительно и пришел и спас нас; в сегодняшнем Евангелии молитва Его к Отцу о нас грешных; в ней Он указал самую высокую жизнь для нас: это полное единение всех в Церкви. Какая иная жизнь может сравниться с этим по высоте? И тогда Христос действительно среди нас. Да Он и действительно среди нас и в нас, Он в каждой хорошей мысли и деле, хотя бы и маленьком; а если мы и вообще будем стараться проводить жизнь в этом добре, то постепенно и вообще и существенно Христос будет среди нас. Потом начались разговоры о пожертвованиях на церковь и счеты их, по поводу моего упоминания о радости епископа ради этого; потом я ушел в воскресную школу; ребят немного, человек 11–12.

Одна христианка Варвара Ямамото помогает в этом деле, рассказывает разные благочестивые истории. Я попросил ребят пропеть что-нибудь; под гармонию, совсем разбитую, они пропели из бдения и литургии многое и очень хорошо; я предложил катехизатору постепенно обучать их для пения в церкви; очень бы хорошо было, и ребятам это понравилось бы; я упомянул, что в России в церкви всегда поют школьники. Дай Бог. Сегодня как-то весело на душе. Дай Бог и дальше. За литургией мне как-то особенно хорошо было молиться, так как я видел некоторое собрание церковное. За бдением опять был тот язычник Мориока. Обо всем этом я подробно и написал Преосвященному и в конце добавил: «Все это я Вам в письмах делаю подробные выборки из дневника, чтобы при случае Вы и поправили или досказали что-нибудь мне. Конечно, все хорошо, что я Вам пишу из своих разговоров с христианами; но ведь это больше то, что я хотел сказать, а не то, что сказал, так как где же японцам понять мои японские разглагольствия? Это Вы и по себе судя (по первоначальному) скажете. И для меня упражнение постепенно привыкнуть и научиться говорить. А японцев все еще с величайшим трудом понимаю, а иногда и совсем не понимаю».

После обеда приходил катехизатор Фудзии и гийю Сираи Андрей (доктор), очень хороший христианин. Я говорил ему об идеальной жизни христиан, согласно с молитвой первосвященнической Иисуса Христа; но очень кратко, за недостатком слов.

With Father Sergius, I looked at the metrics; and he does not know at all where to get many Christians; refers to the fact that he received them in this way from his predecessor, Father John, Ono. And in many weakened houses he had not been here at all; he knows about some that they are here, but does not know their place of residence (9 people); all known 190 people; Of these, 99 did not confess this year. I asked: how can this be explained? Do catechists talk about the need for confession and generally instruct on the path of piety? He replies that they do, but you can't drag them by force. And I: there are no Gentile listeners, at least they would watch their own sheep. Father Sergius says that Christians here are cold, not like in the north, which he often points to as a model. I said with some heart that we didn't care about the north yet, we were in Osaka.

At 6 o'clock I went with the catechist to the Christians. At first, they did not find Anna in Juvase; She is a masseuse and goes to the sick all day long. Then they went to Kitajima, Stephen, an old carpenter; now his wife, an old woman, listens to the teachings of Father Sergius, and on Trinity Day she will probably receive baptism. Very poor, but pious. I told them about the salvific nature of Christ's teaching for us, about how it is really salvific for us: this happens through prayer, by which we gradually draw closer to God, and in our hearts we put all the good things and only gradually begin to live by it. He asked them also to talk about Christian teaching in conversations with neighbors; he advised them to come to church at least in turn; Stephen sometimes comes; And he certainly accepts confession and communion. They have very good humble hearts. Then they went to see Mori Peter, his wife Vera and little child Alexander, who would be baptized on Trinity Day. They go to church very zealously, almost constantly. I asked them to go and encourage others to be jealous, and thus to do the work of Christ (I also told Kitajima that children should also be told about Christ: if they desire salvation for themselves, then they should also wish for others, but children live in other cities and are pagans). In Mori Petra I spoke about the weakened family of Asadzuma Akila: this one, as if ashamed of his poverty and poor kimono, does not go to church, because the Osaka people pay great attention to the kimono; I said that this is not an excuse for God; the apostles were terrible poor people, and it was they who proclaimed the teaching of Christ to all people; perhaps at first there was truth in this excuse on Aquila's mind, but he gradually and completely lost the habit of the church and everything related to the faith, and only then gradually began laziness and passed into complete coldness of heart to the work of faith. Just as an evil person does not understand the goodness of the good, for he is accustomed to live and care only for himself, so a person who does not work in the matter of faith gradually cools down completely and loses all faith, so that it is difficult for him even to think about God and about all that is holy. I advised Peter Mori to see Asazuma sometime and persuade him to cheer up.

From there I went to Asazuma; he has a wife Maria and a son Kirik (7 years old), and another, Nikon, lives with his grandmother in Tokyo. Asazuma moved from Tokyo here. Maria studied at our girls' school in Tokyo.

Akila makes combs for a girls' school in Tokyo. I asked directly: why don't they go to church? It is justified by the weakness of health. I said that ill health does not always happen, and that it is so, is only a simple reservation. He spoke about the necessity, importance and the only essential benefit of prayer for our faith and, consequently, for the entire spiritual life, for salvation. There are innumerable treasures everywhere in the Church, and we run away from them. And running, we gradually and completely move away from God, and faith fades away. He confessed to it. And then everything that has to do with faith and salvation seems completely incomprehensible and inaccessible to us, how can an evil man not understand what is good. For our salvation alone, the Son of God Himself came and endured the cross, but we despise and push away from us this ineffable love of His, which surpasses all things. And if children despised the love of their parents, did not come to them, did not fulfill their will, then how sad and painful it would be for parents. All the more sorrowful are our sins and separation from Him for God, so we make a cross to Him for the second time with our sins and coldness. They did not even make confession; wherefore I said: it is finished, we may not have any gross sins, but in life we constantly distance ourselves from God and forget Him; it is in this that we need to constantly and sincerely repent, in order to return to God and rely only on His strength. It turns out that while living in Tokyo, he was very zealous in various ways for the Church; I advised them to remember all these good old things and cheer up, and to mutually encourage each other to do so. He spoke of the approaching feast of the Holy Spirit and called upon us to come to this great triumph of the Church; By the way, on this day, three or four will be baptized. And during the Apostolic Fast he advised both confession and communion, and spoke from the words of Christ about the importance and indispensable obligation of this sacrament for us, if we wish to enter into eternal life. He briefly told about how Pascha was celebrated in Tokyo today, how many people there were, about the pagans who had gathered for this celebration of ours, and about the general joy on this holiday. He said that the seminarians preached sermons all evening, and Inspector Kawamoto showed pictures of Palestinian life and nature with stories about it; the people listened diligently and attentively to all this. Since Asadzum does not have a prayer book and a church calendar, I advised the catechist to take it to them tomorrow. I returned home at twenty minutes past ten. After the whole day and only in the evening the rain stopped, we had to walk in the mud; Although in the extreme part of the city there was no rain at all and there was no mud.

May 20/June 1. I did not go to the Christians last night, as I was taking a bath, and the Christians are now mostly busy with the accounts with the masters or the workers, on the occasion of the end of the month. Today, at 6 o'clock, together with Paul Sakuma, I went first to Isis Paul. He found only his wife Marina. They are very religious Christians, but they almost do not go to church at all, and this year they have not even confessed yet. I said that you would gradually become unaccustomed to the Church and to God: if I seldom read a book, I would completely forget how to understand it; so is prayer, and our whole Christian life; we are called Christians, and therefore we must try in every possible way to stand as close as possible to Christ, in order to be in His Kingdom. If an illiterate person goes to school, he will not understand anything from all the lessons there; so we, having gradually lost the habit of praying to God and rejoicing in His joy, the joy of faith, and then after death we will not understand anything in the Kingdom of God, since we have not thought about it properly, and therefore we will not live in its light, but in sorrow and suffering.

I advised them to go to church at least in turn, and especially called them to Trinity Day, since this is a great holiday, with which the preaching about Christ began; and during Lent he advised to confess and take communion in order to live one life together with other Christians; for how pleasant it is to spend time in the intimate company of dear friends: here all sorrows are forgotten in heart-to-heart conversations, the soul only rejoices; So it is in the Church: if all Christians gathered in harmony and amicably gathered in church for prayer, and in general did all the things of the Church together, then what a power it would be and how much joy there would be in it for all. I asked her to tell all this to her husband Paul, and to her relatives – the family of Chrysanthos Isis, and I also asked her to dispose them to go to church at least in turn. Marina, during a conversation about the fact that she did not take communion and did not go to church, somehow blushed and then said: now I will try to go to church somehow. And in general, I was very emotional. I refused the offer to take udon (Japanese fish soup) and went to the house of Kinoshita Simon; but he and his family live in Wakayama, and here is only his wife Varvara with a small, not yet baptized, child.

She doesn't go to church either, and maybe it's hard for her to be alone; but he lives very poorly, in a house with pagans. She frankly confessed that even at home sometimes she did not pray at all because of vanity; I said that God does not need our many words, but only one heartfelt contrition before Him, even a brief, but really heartfelt prayer; And if we really pray in this way, then we will really understand the power of prayer for us and the joy of this prayer. And more and more often, carelessly doing this work and more and more often moving away from the church, we gradually and completely forget the church and everything of God, and then faith completely cools in our hearts, and at the same time we ourselves completely grow cold for God and become very far from Him; then we do not understand any joy in God at all. Then he spoke about the feast of the Spirit of the Day as the beginning of Christian preaching, which the Japanese now accept; he called upon us to preserve in our hearts and to warm this highest treasure: after all, Christ endured the cross only for our salvation. He advised me to come to church on this feast, and in general to go to the service to the best of my ability; he advised to baptize a child on this feast, for fear of death for him, who had not yet been baptized; Moreover, on this holiday, four or five people are baptized, both big and small. From here I went to Sato Kirill; But he did not find him, and his son (9 years old), a pagan, asked: "Are we not from the church?" We explained to him and asked him to convey this to his father, as well as that he come to church on Sunday, since then there would be a very great church feast of the descent of the Holy Spirit on the apostles; The boy replied to our question about baptism that he would be baptized next month; therefore we told him briefly about this feast; They advised me to come to Sunday school and generally attend divine services.