All these events took place before the eyes of the young John. Although even in adolescence he was distinguished by an unusual concentration for his age, avoided companionship, and loved to indulge in solitary meditation in the silence of his house, drawing from the reading of the Holy Scriptures and his deep spiritual being material for his education, yet he could not remain completely indifferent to what was happening outside his home, and since his pious mother undoubtedly lived through many anxious days during these persecutions against Christianity, then he, too, had to share her anxieties and fears. One can even think that he took an active part in the affairs of Christians. Reading his enthusiastic eulogy, pronounced later over the grave of the holy confessors of the faith in Christ, the valiant soldiers Justinus and Maximinus, one cannot but bear the impression that he himself once participated in the burial of these martyrs and himself, together with a multitude of other Christians, shed hot tears over their headless corpses. Julian's fury ended with his well-deserved death during the Persian campaign, when, mortally wounded, in a mad rage, he threw clods of mud with his caked blood to the sun, and in his dying breath exclaimed: "Thou hast conquered me, Galilean!" exempted churches from taxes, returned bishops from exile. His successor Valentinian acted in the same way, and although he made a great mistake in inviting Valens as his co-emperor, to whom the East had given him, on the whole he tried to heal the wounds inflicted on Christianity by the royal apostate, and indeed did not a little in this respect, prescribing for example the celebration of Sunday and forbidding various sorcery and night sacrifices, under the pretext of which the pagans committed all kinds of abominable things and supported enmity among the masses of the people against the Christianity.

By this quieter time John was already a young man. At the time of Valentinian's accession to the throne, John was already about 18 years old, and from him blossomed a young man, if not in body, then in soul. Anthusa's motherly heart was delighted at the sight of her son, who, as a treasure she had guarded for so many years from all harmful influences and dangers, now showed all the signs of great gifts. And the loving mother considered it her duty to give him the opportunity to settle down in the world in accordance with his position and gifts. In order to succeed in the field of life, he had to complete his education with some special course, and she, noticing in him a predisposition to oratory and profundity, gave him the opportunity to enter the school of the most famous teacher of eloquence at that time, Livania. He was a pagan sophist, one of Julian's closest accomplices. Like him, he stubbornly adhered to paganism and dreamed of its revival on new philosophical principles. He looked down on Christianity, and although he did not harbor bitter enmity towards it, he was not averse to laughing at his strange beliefs in a carpenter's son. Having once visited a Christian school in Antioch, which was under the guidance of a very pious and strict Christian teacher, Livanius ironically asked the latter: "And what is the carpenter's son doing now?" He, the teacher added, is now building funeral roads." Soon after this came the news of Julian's unexpected death, and the mocking rhetorician could not help pondering the answer he had received from the Christian teacher. In any case, he was not distinguished by any fanatical, blind hostility to Christianity, and therefore the passage of the course of higher eloquence with him was not dangerous even for Christian youths. For example, St. Basil the Great studied with him and even later maintained correspondence with him. Nor could Saint John fear any evil influences from him, who, having been brought up in the pious home of his mother, was now fully a soldier of Christ, who knew how to wield spiritual weapons to repel any attacks on his faith. And he, with his characteristic thirst for knowledge, gave himself up to higher science, and at once showed such talent and began to make such progress that he involuntarily delighted his teacher. The latter, partly not without alarm, saw how in his school grew up this extraordinary orator, who in time threatened to overshadow the teacher himself, and this made him all the more restless, since John was a Christian and was preparing to be a great herald and preacher of Christianity, while Livanius himself still hoped to resurrect the decaying corpse of paganism. There is no doubt that the old sophist would have been very anxious to persuade the young orator to his convictions, and this secret hope compelled him to pay special attention to his beloved pupil. But his hope was in vain. John at this time had almost outlined his life's path, having decided to devote himself to the service of his Lord Jesus Christ, and the old sophist, on his deathbed, with sincere sorrow answered to his attendants the question of whom he would like to appoint as his successor in the school: "John," he groaned, "if the Christians had not stolen him from us."

Along with eloquence, John also studied philosophy under a certain philosopher Andragathius, who was also famous in Antioch. Philosophy at that time had long since lost its former classical character, and by it was meant mainly a superficial study of previous philosophical systems, and the lack of depth of thought was concealed by streams of vague and pompous eloquence. But the more eminent representatives of philosophy nevertheless knew how to give their science the character of a certain wisdom, and if they succeeded in penetrating into the laws of the spiritual life of man, then by doing so they did a service to their disciples, since they drew their attention from the diversity of external phenomena into the mysterious region of the spiritual world. Andragathius probably belonged to this kind of philosopher, and if John later showed an amazing ability to penetrate into the deepest recesses of the spiritual life of people, which shine in his sermons and treatises, then, in addition to his natural spiritual insight, he owed this not less to his teacher.

Having completed his education, John, fully armed with talents and knowledge, was ready to embark on the path of life. As a noble and brilliantly educated young man, a wide field opened up before him.

All the almost noble youth of that time began their public life as a lawyer, and it was practiced, for example, by Saints Basil the Great, Ambrose of Milan, Sulpicius Severus and other celebrities of that time. This occupation immediately led John into the stormy whirlwind of life, and he came face to face with that world of untruths, intrigues, insults and oppressions, enmity and lies, tears and malevolence, of which the everyday life of people is composed, and which he did not know in the peaceful home of his pious mother.

At the same time, his advocacy accustomed him to public oratory, and he immediately showed such brilliant success in this field that his old teacher Livanius involuntarily admired him. The young lawyer obviously had a brilliant future ahead of him: his oratory acquired him wide fame, which, while giving him abundant funds, at the same time opened the way to the highest state posts. From among the most gifted lawyers, who had made a name for themselves in the courts, the government invited persons to whom it represented the administration of the provinces, and John, following such a road, could gradually reach the highest offices - sub-prefect, prefect, patrician and consul, with which rank was associated the title "famous" - illustris. And the shown side of this life could not but captivate the young man, who had just looked out into the broad light of God, especially since all social pleasures and amusements were inseparable from this life. A man of society had to visit theaters and circuses and, willy-nilly, give himself over to those hobbies and passions with which society people tried to fill the emptiness of their lives. And it is true that John and his young friends and companions visited these places of amusement, but it was here that his unspoiled nature was most indignant at such emptiness. Both advocacy and these amusements showed him with irresistible clarity all the emptiness and falsehood of such a life, and he saw how far this real world, with its iniquities and malices, with its passions and vices, was from that divine ideal which was presented to him when, as he himself loved to say, having drunk his soul from the pure source of the Holy Scriptures, With an immaculate heart he entered the field of life. His soul could not endure this test, and he decided to break all connection with this worthless world of lies and unrighteousness, in order to devote himself entirely to the service of God and the pursuit of that spiritual perfection which had become the need of his soul.

This beneficial revolution was greatly facilitated by one of his closest friends and contemporaries, namely Basil[4]. John speaks enthusiastically of the friendship that bound him to him even in adolescence. "I had many friends," he says at the beginning of his book "On the Priesthood," sincere and faithful, who knew and strictly observed the laws of friendship; but of many, one surpassed all others in love for me. He was always my inseparable companion: we studied the same sciences and had the same teachers; were engaged in eloquence with the same eagerness and zeal, and had the same desires arising from the same occupations." But then a shadow of separation lay between the friends. When John gave himself up to secular social life, his friend Basil devoted himself to "true wisdom," i.e., he accepted monasticism. The example of a true friend could not fail to influence John, and although for some time he still indulged in worldly dreams and passions, the reverse side of worldly life that he saw struck him so much that he began to gradually free himself from the storm of life, again became close to Basil, who did not fail to exert on him all the good influence of which true friendship is capable, and - John decided to abandon this miserable, the vain world with its malice and endless tribulations, in order to devote oneself entirely to God and true wisdom.

The friend deeply rejoiced at this change in the life of his companion, and their intention to work together in the field of monastic life was ready to come true. But unexpectedly an important obstacle was encountered, namely on the part of the pious Anthusa. Having brought up her son and put him on the path of life, she achieved the goal of her many years of care and, like a mother, of course, rejoiced at her son's success.

What sorrow struck her tender motherly heart when she learned that her beloved John had decided to enter the monastic life! All her hopes were shattered, and she could not bear it. Summoning to her aid all the strength of the persuasiveness of her motherly love, she began to beg him with tears not to plunge her into a second widowhood and orphanhood, and these tears could not but shake his decision. He renounced his idea and remained at his mother's house, although now he was completely devoid of all worldly hobbies and devoted himself entirely to feats of piety, studying the Holy Scriptures, which forever became the main source that filled his thirsty soul. Together with Basil, they attended a special ascetic school, where the Holy Scriptures were taught by the most famous teachers of that time, the presbyters Flavian and Diodorus, and these pious teachers, and especially Diodorus, finally strengthened him in the idea of devoting himself to the feats of teaching and piety. Probably through this school, or perhaps even earlier, John became close to the pious Bishop Meletius, who, paying attention to the gifted and pious youth, bound him to himself and performed the holy sacrament of baptism on him. At this time John was about 22 years old (369). The reason why his baptism was postponed for so long is partly due to the custom of the time to postpone baptism until adulthood, when all the hobbies of youth have passed, and also, probably, to the circumstances of the time. The Church of Antioch at this time was overwhelmed by sad turmoil, which was carried out by the Arians. Having seized power in their own hands, they boldly and strongly pressed the Orthodox, sowing discord among themselves, so that their pious bishop Meletius was exiled several times. In this state of affairs was in the first years of John's childhood and continued at intervals for more than twenty years. Therefore, it is quite natural that Anthusa, deeply devoted to the Orthodox Church, had enough reason to postpone the baptism of her son, so as not to become an accomplice in the pernicious heresy. Now the troubles had somewhat subsided, Bishop Meletius could return to Antioch and reoccupy his throne, and the Christians of Antioch could be baptized with a clear conscience and safely. Baptism had a profound effect on John. If even before he had decided to devote himself to the spiritual life, now, having accepted the bath of rebirth, he clung with all his soul to the feats of piety, and the archpastor Meletius, noticing his pious inclinations, elevated him to the office of reader, which gave him the opportunity to fully satisfy his love for the reading of the Holy Scriptures. In order to concentrate entirely on this exercise, John even took a vow of abstinence in speech, and - a recent lawyer and orator - he became almost silent: he refrained from all idle talk and jokes, and thus accumulated in himself the spiritual strength that he needed later.

Meanwhile, troubles began again in Antioch; the Arians, taking advantage of the assistance of the emperor Valens, again began to press the Orthodox, and Meletius was exiled to prison. The situation of the Orthodox in general was difficult, and the clergy in particular. For John, a new grief was added: his pious mother Anthusa died. He remained lonely, and then he decided to put an end to this sinful world, full of all kinds of turmoil, anxiety and sorrow, and to retire to the desert - for a hermit's life. His friend Basil was triumphant and happy for his contemporary, and both of them tried in general to convert as many friends and comrades of their youth as possible to this true wisdom. John himself, burning with zeal for spiritual asceticism, was therefore all the more distressed when he learned that one of his friends, who had recently given himself over to true wisdom and strove for asceticism, had changed his mind and, carried away by love for a certain Hermione, decided to leave the hermitage and marry his beloved. Extremely grieved by this, John wrote to his friend two extremely powerful and eloquent exhortations, in which, mourning the fall of his friend and depicting the vanity of the world with its charms, he called on Theodore to abandon his vain thoughts and return to wisdom. The exhortations - this is his first Christian edifying creation - had a force and Theodore repented of his weakness, returned to asceticism and subsequently became the bishop of Mopsuestia[5].

The young friends with all the fervor of youth gave themselves over to spiritual feats, and John now competed with his friend Basil in matters of piety: asceticizing himself, he encouraged others to ascetic deeds in deed and word, arousing in the lazy a striving for heaven - through the mortification of his flesh and its enslavement to the spirit. Rumors of their extraordinary asceticism spread throughout the surrounding area, and those suffering in spirit and body were drawn to them from everywhere and received healing. About this time John wrote his two words "on contrition" to the monks Demetrius and Stelachius, giving them a lesson of consolation to all those who suffer spiritually and are contrite for their sins. The Orthodox inhabitants of Antioch were amazed at the feats of the young monks, and even the council of bishops came to the idea of how good it would be to bring them closer to the Church, which was then in need of self-sacrificing pastors. And then a rumor spread that a plan had already been drawn up to take them both and ordain them as bishops. In those troubled times, such cases were not uncommon: young people were also elevated to the rank of bishop, if they proved worthy of this dignity in their intelligence and piety. The honor was to be great, but this news greatly astonished and alarmed John. It was for this reason that he withdrew into the wilderness, in order to save his soul in solitude, far from the troubles of this world, and now they again want to place him in the midst of these troubles, and moreover in such a high rank that he did not even dare to think of. Therefore, he decided to evade this election in one way or another, and since his friend Basil turned out to be more inclined to the pre-election of God, he even deliberately assisted him in this, and he himself took refuge in the wilderness. Basil was indeed taken and ordained a bishop, and when, having learned of the deed of his friend, he began to complain about him, Reader John, in justification of himself and in consolation of his friend, wrote a famous book: "Six Words on the Priesthood," in which he set forth all the sublimity and difficulty of pastoral service. This book has forever become an indispensable guide for every shepherd of souls, and it is from it that all true pastors have drawn spiritual courage and strength to this day, ruling the word of truth well. Basil, having calmed down from his excitement, zealously devoted himself to his archpastoral service and, as bishop of Rafan, subsequently participated in the 2nd Ecumenical Council in the year 381.

Meanwhile, John, having escaped the episcopacy, gave himself up even more strongly to his spiritual asceticism. In this time of troubles, when there was a heavy uncertainty in political life, and the pernicious domination of the Arians continued in ecclesiastical life, many pious people preferred to leave this miserable world with its troubles, troubles, and calamities for the better, in order to find complete peace in the wilderness. There, in silent solitude, in the midst of eternally beautiful nature, all the evils of this world fell silent, and the hermits could care with a lightened heart for the salvation of their souls. For this reason the surrounding mountains of Antioch were filled with hermits, and a whole community was formed of them, which led a life full of spiritual feats. They were true soldiers of Christ, constantly standing on guard against the attacks of the flesh. Already at midnight they rose to prayer and resounded the desert mountains with harmonious psalmody. Having rested for a while, they then rose again at sunrise and performed matins, after which each was occupied in his cell with reading the Holy Scriptures or copying holy books. During the day, at certain hours, they again gathered for common prayer, which was called the Third, Sixth, Ninth and Vespers Hours, and in the intervals they were engaged in various kinds of work, by which they obtained their meager food. According to the vow of non-acquisitiveness, everything was common to them, as in the times of the Apostles, so that they did not know the very words of mine and yours. The life of these ascetics was difficult and austere, but she found full reward for herself in that spiritual peace which she established, delighting them with hope in God's mercy and joy in the grace that descended upon them from above. John spent four years in this monastic monastery (375-378), and the austere life only increased his zeal for asceticism even more. True, for him, who had been brought up in contentment, under the loving care of his mother, in a rich house, where all his needs were met by servants, it was more difficult than for anyone to endure all the hardships of the hermit's life in this austere monastery of ascetics. And indeed, he himself was afraid of the labors that lay ahead of him, especially since even because of his very weakness of body he could not endure such severe asceticism. But weak in body, he was powerful in spirit, and not only overcame all the difficulties of monastic life, but at the same time waged a struggle against the dangerous spirit of the times, which rose up against monasticism. This spirit hostile to monasticism began with the accession of the emperor Valens. Carried away by the networks of the Arians, Valens turned out to be a cruel enemy of the Orthodox and began a merciless persecution against them. Knowing that the main stronghold of Orthodoxy was monasticism, he directed all his fury against the monks; by his order the famous Nitrian monasteries were devastated, and this persecution ended with the barbarous burning of 24 Orthodox pastors in Nicomedia. Even the pagans were indignant at such inhumanity, but nevertheless there were many who, taking advantage of the mood of the emperor, themselves assisted him, placing all kinds of obstacles for those who wished to accept the monastic life and presenting the monks as enemies of the fatherland and the state. And it was during this difficult time that John came out as a champion of monasticism and wrote "three books to those who are hostile to those who attract them to the monastic life." In these books he poured out all the fervor of his monastic heart and eloquently proved what happiness the soul finds in the wilderness, in solitary communion with God. Under the same impression, he wrote a short discourse under the title: "A Comparison of the Power, Wealth, and Privileges of the Tsar with the True and Christian Wisdom of Monastic Life." These works constitute an inexhaustible source of edification for monks and those striving for monasticism. Edifying others, John treated himself even more strictly, and not being satisfied with the exploits of the coenobitic monastery, he finally withdrew from it, in order to subject his flesh to even more severe trials by a solitary life in a cave. He felt within himself the power of Elijah or John the Baptist, and like them he strove into the wilderness, in order to prepare himself far from the world for the great service that lay ahead of him. In his zeal for asceticism, he would be ready to settle forever in the wilderness; but God's Providence judged otherwise. Such a great lamp should not have been under a bushel, in the wilderness and in a cave, but it was necessary to shine brightly for all on the candlestick of the church. Severe asceticism upset John's health, and he had to leave the wilderness and return to Antioch. There he was greeted with joy by Blessed Meletius and ordained to the dignity of deacon. Having previously declined the high rank of bishop, John now humbly accepted the dignity of deacon (380), and from that time a new period in his life began. 

The ministry of John Chrysostom as a deacon and presbyter in Antioch (381-398)