Let us turn to the saints themselves, and from Joseph let us pass on to Moses.

Could he, not wanting to live or be inscribed in the book of God, without their salvation (Exodus 32:38)

Thus, unable to persuade or compel his pretended father to revoke the brutal and murderous command, he himself finally decided to share the misfortunes with them. However, I am not so much surprised at this, as I am amazed at the flame of sorrow which Moses carried within himself in the previous time, and which I conclude from the murder he committed. Whoever was driven by sorrow to murder, through the latter revealed the power of the former. Of course, he would not have taken such cruel revenge on the Egyptians, if he had not lamented the misfortunes of their children more than the parents themselves. What, then, after he had avenged and relieved his soul somewhat from such sorrow, did he have time to fully enjoy the joy given him by this vengeance? Scarcely had the second day come, when another sorrow befell this blessed one, heavier than the first, and such fear seized him, which compelled him to depart from Egypt altogether. It is difficult to hear bad things from anyone; but when any of the benefactors speak evil, he will reproach him for the good deeds done to him, and reproach him thus: "Do you not think to kill me, as you killed the Egyptian?" (Exodus 2:14), then, then the offense is unbearable and can even lead the offended person out of patience; Such is what it produces irritation along with sorrow! But Moses added to this a third thing - the fear of the king, which so took possession of the soul of the righteous man that even expelled him from all the country there. Thus becomes a fugitive - the king's son!

Having become a fugitive, he comes to a man who was an idolater and a foreigner; and to enjoy the hospitality of a man who has devoted himself to the service of demons for so long is not an unimportant cause for sorrow. Here Moses, having taken charge of the man's flock, spent forty years in this occupation. If this does not seem in the least difficult to anyone, then let us remember those who leave their homeland and hide not out of fear and fear, but leave home voluntarily for a short time, how they languish, how sad, what a blessing they consider their return to their homeland! And when fear and misery are added to this, and the most burdens and sorrows seem lighter than the desired return to his homeland, then imagine the picture of Moses' misfortunes! Do not simply listen to what is said that Moses "tended the sheep" (Exodus 3:1), but remember the words of Jacob, with which he complained to his father-in-law: "Thou hast exacted from me, whether by day what was lost, whether by night it was lost; I languished by day with heat, and by night with cold, and my sleep fled from my eyes" (Gen. 31:39,40). All this, of course, was also the case with Moses, and for a still greater number of years and to a greater degree, since the country (Midian) was more desolate than the country (Mesopotamia). If Moses did not complain about this, then the blessed one would not have said such words, if he had not been driven to a great extreme and forced to do so by the ingratitude of his father-in-law. Thus, a foreign land in itself can oppress a person, even if he left his homeland only out of necessity. "As a bird," says the all-wise, "that hath forsaken its nest, so hath a man that hath forsaken his place" (Proverbs 27:8). Moreover, Moses could not then be sure even of his own safety; but just as a servant who has fled from a cruel master is constantly afraid and fears that he will not be caught, so the blessed Moses lived in constant fear. This is evident from the fact that even when God commands him to return to Egypt after such a long time, he refuses and delays, although he has heard that "all who sought his life are dead" (Exodus 4:19).

2. But when he obeyed and went into Egypt, being compelled to leave his wife and children, then there again began reproaches, and insults, and threats from the then king of Egypt, and complaints and curses from those who received benefits. He says: "Why do you, Moses and Aaron, distract the people from their works? go to your work" (Exodus 5:4). And the Israelites say: "May the Lord see and judge you, because you have made us hateful in the sight of Pharaoh and his servants, and have given them a sword in their hands to kill us" (Exodus 5:21).

Who would not fall into despondency when, having promised to put an end to such great calamities, after the promise he himself saw the addition of others, even more grievous calamities? Moses was discouraged, as it is natural for one to be discouraged when he hears and sees such things; However, he did not fall under the weight of this tribulation, but remained unyielding, although events not only did not correspond to, but even contradicted his promises. Turning to God and speaking about this, he wept a lot and said: "Lord! Why hast thou subjected this people to such calamity, why hast thou sent me? for from the time that I came to Pharaoh and spoke in Thy name, he began to deal worse with this people; but to deliver, Thou hast not delivered Thy people" (Exodus 5:22,23). Shedding tears and hearing again from God the same command as before, he again announces this to the Israelites, but they do not heed him, because their souls were oppressed with sorrow and despondency. "They did not listen," says the Scriptures, "to Moses because of his faint-heartedness and the burden of his labors" (Exodus 6:9). And this grieved him not a little. When miracles followed, and Pharaoh laughed at him many times, he bravely endured these mockery as well. When at last he came out of Egypt, and together with the Jews began to hope for deliverance, he had not yet had time to fully rest, when he was seized by his former or even much greater fear. In less than three days the Israelites saw the barbarians armed before them, and they experienced the same experience as some fugitive slaves feel when they suddenly find themselves in a foreign land before the eyes of their masters, or what they themselves would experience if they happened to see themselves in a pleasant dream in freedom, and when they awoke to find themselves again in Egypt and in the same calamities. However, I do not know what can be called their dream, whether three days of freedom, or the terrible and terrible sight that now presented itself to them: such a haze of despondency covered the eyes of all of them. And Moses was seized with even greater darkness: he feared not only the Egyptians, like the rest of the Israelites, but also the latter along with the former. Both now looked upon him as a deceiver and a seducer, some with mockery and readiness to attack, and others with anger and sorrow. However, why judge the despondency of this man by conjectures, when his sorrow can be fully understood from the words of those who came down from above? When he was silent and did not even dare to open his mouth, God said to him: "Why do you cry out to Me" (Exodus 14:15)? - with this one word explaining to us the confusion of his soul.

3. When this fear had passed, then even greater troubles arose again. Those who were led by Moses and received through him many blessings throughout the whole journey behaved worse towards him than the Egyptians and Pharaoh. In the first place, they acted with great boldness, demanding of him the flesh of Egypt: they did not thank him for the present, but wanted the former; This was the hardest of all.

He was not so upset that he was being insulted as that they were insulters. It is also criminal that they were ungrateful before sending down the miraculous food; but even in the midst of miracles they showed their wickedness, lawlessness, and greed in gathering food, and, having gone a little forward, they again murmured, again expressed dissatisfaction with the blessings of God; and on each such occasion the blessed one was crushed and grieved more than the sinners themselves. Thus, when they made a calf, they themselves played and rejoiced, but Moses lamented and grieved, invoked a terrible curse on himself, and, nevertheless, nothing could make him suppress his compassion for them.

But tell me, what did he do for this? The very method of healing, although it helped the cause, was filled with many tears; and there was not a man of stone who did not suffer in the least at the sight of his brothers and relatives beating one another, subjecting to this deplorable slaughter up to three thousand people (Exodus 32:28). And we, when we catch our children doing some evil deed, of course, punish and flog them, but we do this not without regret, but on the contrary, we grieve no less than those who suffer punishment themselves.

4. During the time of the great tribulation of Moses and the militia (of the Jews), a new sorrow befell them. God threatened that He Himself would no longer lead them, but would leave them and hand over their leadership to an angel; this was the most unbearable thing for Moses. Listen to what he says to God: "If you do not go with us, do not bring us out of here" (Exodus 33:15). Do you see how fear was replaced by fear, and sorrow by sorrow? But the calamity did not stop there: when Moses bowed down to God, and the Lover of Mankind was propitiated and granted grace, the Jews again plunged Moses into new sorrows, angering the merciful God and subjecting themselves to extreme misfortunes. After a much lamentable massacre, they again angered God so much that they called upon themselves a fire that would have destroyed almost all of them, if God had not shown great love for mankind. And Moses had to experience a double sorrow - both from the fact that the Israelites were perishing, and from the fact that the survivors did not reform and did not receive any benefit from the death of their brothers. The slaughter was not yet over, and the survivors had already remembered the onions and, not content with what they had, said: "Who will feed us with meat? We remember the fish that in Egypt we ate for nothing, cucumbers and melons, and onions, and onions and garlic; but now our soul is faint; there is nothing but manna in our eyes" (Num. 11:4-6). Then Moses, no longer able to endure their ingratitude, and exhausted by sorrow, renounced his superiority and wished for death instead of such a bitter life. Listen to his own words: "And Moses said," says the Scripture,

I alone cannot bear all this people, because they are heavy for me; when Thou doest such things to me, it is [better] to put me to death, if I have found mercy in Thy sight" (Num. 11:11-15). This was said by the one who once said: "Forgive them their sin, and if not, blot me also out of Thy book, in which Thou hast written" (Exodus 32:32). His sorrow had changed him so much! The same often happens to parents when they are upset by the actions of their children. However, Moses, even after these words, did not cease to have compassion for the Israelites, as is evident from what he did afterwards. When, after their attempt to kill the spies and stone him, he escaped from their hands, he again turned to prayer for them and besought God to be merciful to those who wanted to kill him (Numbers 14:10-20); so his love was stronger even than natural affection! Then, when the spies were dead, and the time of the former weeping had not yet passed, the Israelites again caused him new sorrow, firstly, because they did not obey his prohibition to fight, and, secondly, because they were struck by the Amalekites (Num. 14:41-45); and even before this war, many perished from greed and gluttony (Numbers 11:33). "He slew," says the Scriptures, "they were fat, and the young men of Israel, and food was still in their mouths" (Psalm 77:30,31).

And when the Jews had conquered the Canaanites, and had made a long round, they murmured again, and perished again, not from sickness, as before, nor from fire and scattered earth, as before, but from the bites of poisonous serpents, which would have destroyed them all, if Moses had not again appeared before God and implored Him. When they were delivered from this destruction and escaped the curses of the sorcerer, they again rushed into the most disastrous abysses: after the blessings of Balaam, or, rather, God's (for the words of Balaam depended not on his will, but on the power working in him), they began to commit adultery with the daughters of foreigners and serve Beelphegor. Moses, seeing such shame and disgrace, again commanded them to kill one another, saying: "Kill every man his people who are cleaved to Baal-Peor" (Num. 25:5), just as in the case of a bodily wound that does not heal after repeated dissections and cauterizations, they are ordered to cut again and cauterize what is left. However, when you hear about these difficulties, do not think that they were the only ones; I have omitted not a few of those mentioned (in the Scriptures): wars, the resistance of enemies, long journeys, insult from the sister, her punishment, about which the meek Moses especially lamented; but even if I had carefully collected everything, then what I have described would not have been a thousandth part of what actually happened. If the steward of a few servants in a house meets with many occasions for grief and sorrow, then he who is obliged to govern so many thousands for forty years, and in the wilderness, where there was neither (healthy) air nor water, how many things to do every day, how many cares, how many sorrows, both during the life and after the death of men? He saw all those whom he brought out of Egypt dead, except only two men; but he himself did not vouchsafe to bring their descendants into the promised land, but only saw it from the top of Mount Nebab and studied its nature well, but was not allowed to enjoy it with the rest of the Israelites, but remained outside it and died, about which he himself lamented before the Israelites in these words: "And the Lord was angry with me because of you, and I swore that I would not cross the Jordan, nor enter the good land which the Lord your God is giving you as an inheritance. I will die in this land without going beyond the Jordan, but you will go over and possess that good land" (Deuteronomy 4:21,22). And the most difficult thing is that God brought him to the tomb with sorrow, since Moses knew beforehand what calamities would befall the Jews: idolatry, captivity, unspeakable misfortunes, which is why he was crushed in his soul not only about what he himself had seen and what had already happened, but also about what had not yet happened. Thus, having begun to grieve and grieve from an early age, he ended his life with the same despondency.

5. And his successor Joshua ate with him, so to speak, all that was bitter; but if he escaped anything in his youth, he made up for it after the death of Moses. Not only did he tear his clothes and sprinkle ashes on his head during Moses' lifetime, but after his death he was again put in the same or even greater extremity, so that not for a short time, but for a whole day he lay on the ground. Listen to his words and lamentations: "Jesus tore asunder," says the Scriptures, "his garments, and fell on his face to the ground before the ark of the Lord [and lay] until the evening, he and the elders of Israel, and sprinkled dust on their heads. And Jesus said, O Lord Lord! Why hast thou brought this people over the Jordan, that thou mayest deliver us into the hands of the Amorites, and destroy us? Oh, if only we had stayed and lived beyond the Jordan! Oh, Lord! what shall I say after Israel has turned the rear of her enemies? The Canaanites and all the inhabitants of the earth will hear us, and surround us, and will cut off our name from the earth" (Joshua 7:6-9). Hearing this, God revealed to him the author of the defeat; and Jesus, having learned this, destroyed everyone, not only the sinner, but also his relatives and household, and a multitude of cattle (Joshua 7:24-26); and this did not a little disturb his soul. If we cannot look when strangers are called, then what did he not suffer, exposing his countrymen and comrades-in-arms to such calamities? And how did the deception of the Gibeonites, and the suspicion fall upon the tribes that dwelt on the other side of the Jordan? How difficult was it to constantly stay in war and in battles? What soul could remain calm at the same time? If he won victories, the pleasure of receiving trophies was overshadowed by worries about the wars that were still ahead. The division of the plots also gave him much trouble and much trouble; Those who have been entrusted with the division of property, however small, among brothers or other heirs after someone know this. I do not consider it necessary to speak of the subsequent misfortunes of the Jewish people; for it is no longer a question of whether anyone has led a life of sorrow, but of which of those who have pleased God (led such a life).

6. Therefore, if you will, let us omit Eli, who offended God by the wickedness of his children, or rather, by his carelessness. He was punished not because he had wicked children, but because he spared them more than was proper and did not punish them for transgressing the laws of God; realizing this, he himself, after a strong threat from God, said: "Lord; whatsoever pleases Him, let him do" (1 Samuel 3:18). Leaving him, then, let us pass on to Samuel, who from childhood was brought up in the temple, was always distinguished by piety before God, and from an early age proved to be so virtuous that, before he had yet matured, he was numbered among the wondrous prophets, and moreover at a time when prophecy was lacking: "In those days," says the Scriptures, "visions [were] not frequent, the word of the Lord was rare" (1 Samuel 3:1). This Samuel, born after many tears, was first of all saddened and troubled, like a grateful and loving disciple, seeing his teacher stricken with a miserable death; and then he had to constantly weep over the misfortunes of the Jews. His sons, impious, wicked, and utterly devoted to vice, grieved him both with their lives and with the fact that they could not inherit the honor bestowed upon him (1 Samuel 8:3). This sorrow was followed, or rather not followed, for it did not cease, but was joined by the unlawful demand of the Israelites, whereupon Samuel was so discouraged that he needed great consolation. Listen to what God says to him: "They have not rejected you, but they have rejected Me" (1 Samuel 8:7). However, even after this, Samuel cared for them so much that he said to them: "I will not allow myself to sin before the Lord, that I should cease to pray for you" (1 Samuel 12:23). Therefore, when he saw them, so beloved by him, in distress, slain in wars, angering God, could he feel any pleasure, could he ever remain without sorrow and tears? And when he made Saul king, sorrows again followed for him uninterruptedly, one after another. Thus, when Saul offered a sacrifice contrary to the will of God, when, having defeated the Amalekites, he spared their king, again contrary to the commandment, Samuel was so stricken in his soul that he did not see this man again, but from that time until the last day he lamented and wept for him, although he was reproached for his excessive sorrow. God said to him: "How long shall you grieve for Saul, whom I have rejected" (1 Samuel 16:1). If he wept at these events, what happened to him when Saul slew so many priests in vain and without guilt? - When did he go to kill his benefactor, who had done him no harm? - when did he see Saul naked prophesying and lying on the ground? - when he listened to David's many lamentations and complaints about Saul?