Sacred secret vision! a sacred vision of the mind! With what unexpected suddenness you appear in a picturesque, striking picture before a mind prepared for the vision of the mysteries by repentance and attentive, solitary prayer! How the knowledge you impart is powerful, clear, and alive! What an indisputable, incomprehensible conviction! You are independent of men: you come to him whom you choose or to whom you are sent. In vain would man want to penetrate into spiritual mysteries by himself, by his own effort alone! He will be only a weak dreamer, groping in the darkness of self-deception, feeling and communicating neither light nor life. As chains sound on the hands and feet of a slave, so in the thoughts and words of the dreamer there will be an echo of violence, counterfeiting, coercion, slavery and the abomination of sin. The path to spiritual mystery is constant abiding in repentance, in weeping and tears for one's sinfulness. Weeping and tears are the collurion with which the eyes of the soul are healed [860].

St. Sergius Hermitage, 1846.

The Sea of Life

Before my eyes is the majestic sea. In the north, it is mostly cloudy and stormy; and sometimes it is beautiful. A vast sea! the deep sea! You attract to yourself both eyes and thoughts. I look at the sea for a long time indistinctly. There is no variety in this spectacle; but the gaze and thoughts cannot tear themselves away from it: it is as if they float on the vast sea, as if they are immersed in it, as if they are drowning in it. What fullness is felt in the soul when the eyes enjoy and are satiated with the contemplation of the sea! Let's see, friends, let us look at the sea from our monastery shelter, built by the hand of God's Providence by the sea.

Beyond the sea is another sea: the capital of the mighty North. Its view across the sea is magnificent, from the seashore, on which the monastery of St. Sergius is located [861]. This sea is a section of the famous Belt. It spreads widely, crystal, silver, between the sloping banks. It is closed by Kronstadt, beyond which the infinity of the sea merges with the infinity of the sky.

St. David once sang the great and vast sea. There are the reptiles, of which there are innumerable, he says, small animals with great ones, fish of the sea, passing paths of the sea; there the ships sail, this serpent, whom thou hast created, and scolds him [862]. David's words have a mysterious meaning. The Holy Fathers explain this meaning. The world is called a sea; the innumerable animals and fish with which the sea is filled are people of all ages, nationalities, and ranks, who serve sin; the Holy Church in general is called ships, in particular, true Christians who overcome the world are named. The serpent that dwells in the sea is the fallen angel cast down from heaven to earth [863].

The Holy Church is carried along the waters of the sea of life throughout its entire earthly pilgrimage, through centuries and millennia. Belonging to the world in material status, it does not belong to it in spirit, as the Lord said to the Church in the person of the Apostles: "From the world you bear, but you have chosen from the world" [864]: according to the body, according to the needs of the body, you belong to the world; in spirit you are strangers to the world, because you belong to God, whom the world has hated. The Holy Church is carried by the waves of the sea of life and dwells above the waves of its Divine teaching, containing in its bosom the true knowledge of God, the true knowledge of man, of good and evil, of the material and temporal world, of the spiritual and eternal world. All true Christians throughout the world belong to the one true Church and, containing her teaching in fullness and purity, constitute that assembly of ships which sails the sea of life without sinking into its dark depths.

Every true Christian wanders on the waters of the sea of life, strives for eternity. There can be no permanent dwelling on the material sea; only a pilgrimage lives on it: even on the sea of life there is nothing permanent, there is nothing that would remain a person's property forever, accompanying him beyond the grave. Only his good deeds and his sins go with him into eternity. Naked he enters earthly life, and leaves it, leaving the body as well. The slaves of the world, the slaves of sin, do not see this: the true Christian sees this. He can be likened to a great ship, filled with spiritual treasures of various kinds, constantly multiplying them on its way. The world cannot contain these riches — they are so great. So precious are these riches that all the riches of the world are nothing in comparison. The world envies these riches, breathes hatred for the one who has acquired them. A ship, despite the strength of its structure and size, is swept by contrary winds, storms, underwater rocks, shoals: every Christian, despite the fact that he is clothed in Christ, must make an earthly pilgrimage in the midst of numerous dangers. All, without any exception, who wish to be saved will be persecuted [866]. The ship is striving for the pier; on the way he stops only for the shortest time, in case of extreme need. And we must strive with all our might for heaven, for eternity. Let us not cling to anything temporal in our hearts! Let not our soul cling to anything earthly, let it not cling to the action of the self-deception that dwells in us, through the action of the self-deception that surrounds us! Through our fall, our soul has humbled itself into the dust, it has received an attraction to all that is perishable, our womb clinging to the earth, our spiritual essence, instead of striving for heaven and eternity. Let us carry out our earthly services, our earthly duties, as laid upon us by God, fulfilling them as if before the eyes of God, conscientiously, with diligence, preparing to give an account of their fulfillment to God. Let not these ministries be defiled by sinful motives and goals! Let us do earthly works for the purpose of pleasing God, and earthly deeds will become heavenly works. Let our main and essential occupation be service to God, the striving to assimilate Him. Service to God consists in the unceasing remembrance of God and His commands, in the fulfillment of these commands by all one's behavior, visible and invisible.

The helmsman manages the ship: he constantly thinks about the pier to which the ship's cargo is to be delivered; he is constantly taking care not to go astray into the sea, on which there is a way everywhere, and there are no paths. Now he looks at the sky, at its luminaries, then at the land map and the compass - considering both of them, he directs the ship. A person is controlled by his mind. And there are no paths in the sea of life; everywhere is the way on it for a true Christian. No one knows what circumstances will meet him in the future, which will meet him in a day, in an hour. For the most part, the unforeseen and unexpected meet with us. It is impossible to rely on the constancy of a fair wind: it sometimes blows for a long time, but more often it suddenly turns into a contrary one, replaced by a terrible storm. For a Christian, there is a path everywhere: he believes that everything that happens to him is done according to the will of God. For a Christian, even a contrary wind can be favorable: obedience to the will of God reconciles him with the most burdensome, most bitter situations. Our mind must constantly direct its gaze to the spiritual heaven — the Gospel, from which, like the sun, the teaching of Christ shines; he must constantly watch his heart, his conscience, his inner and outer activity. Let this helmsman strive unswervingly towards blessed eternity, remembering that forgetting eternal bliss leads to eternal calamity. Let the mind restrain the heart from being carried away by addiction to vain and perishable things, from cooling for the sake of corruption to the incorruptible, from the sake of the vain to the true and essential. Let him often look closely, as if to a compass needle, to his conscience, so as not to take a direction that does not agree with the direction indicated by conscience. Let him direct all activity in a manner pleasing to God, so that the cloudy harbor of eternity may open its gates and let into its bosom a ship laden with spiritual treasures.

Let us not be afraid of the storms of the sea of life. Its waves ascend to the heavens, descend to the abysses; but a living faith does not allow a Christian to drown in fierce waves. Faith arouses the Saviour, who sleeps on the stern, Who, in a mysterious sense, appears to be asleep for His disciples crossing the sea of life, when they themselves sink into negligence: faith cries out to the Saviour with fervent prayer from a humble heart, from a heart that is sick for sinfulness and human weakness, asks for help, deliverance, and receives them. The Lord and Master of all forbids the winds and the sea, and establishes great silence in the sea and in the air [868]. Vera, tempted by the storm of the wind, feels herself strengthened: with new strength, with new courage, she prepares herself for new feats.

Let us not trust the silence of the sea of life: this silence is deceptive; The sea is changeable. Let us not allow ourselves to indulge in carelessness: a ship may unexpectedly run aground or hit an inconspicuous underwater rock covered with a gentle trickle, hit and receive severe damage. Sometimes an apparently insignificant cloud rolls in: suddenly it begins to spew out whirlwinds, thunder, lightning, and the feigned calm sea boils like a dangerous storm. Our life is full of sorrows, vicissitudes, and temptations. Our minds slander us: this guide often goes astray of its own accord, and leads our whole life astray. Our heart will slander us, inclining to fulfill its own suggestions, withdrawing from the fulfillment of the will of God. Sin will slander us: both the sin that is implanted in us by the fall, and the one that acts upon us from the temptations that surround us from everywhere. The world will slander us, serving vanity and corruption, which is trying to incline everyone to this service, both by means of caresses and by means of persecution. Our enemies, the fallen spirits, will slander us; we are slandered by the people who possess them, who are enslaved by them. Often the most friends arbitrarily and unwittingly become our libelers. The Lord commanded us to be constantly vigilant over ourselves, exercising ourselves in virtues, guarding ourselves from sin with the Word of God, prayer, faith, and humility.

Who are the great animals grazing in the boundless expanse of the sea of life? Neither for myself nor for anyone else would I like to resemble these giants of the sea, which have one joy: dark depths, densely covered with water, where the rays of the sun do not reach; there they live, there they stay, coming out from time to time for prey, to maintain their lives by killing numerous victims. Their moist, wild eyes do not tolerate, cannot endure any light. By their name the Scriptures mean people who are great in abilities, knowledge, wealth, power, but — alas! — bound with all their souls to vanity and corruption. Their hearts and thoughts are directed exclusively to the attainment of the earthly glorious, the earthly sweet. They are drowned, they are mired in the sea of life, they chase after one temporary, momentary, only phantoms: they traverse, says the Scriptures, the paths of the sea [869]. Strange are these paths! Their traces disappear after those who pass through them, and for those who pass by there is no sign of the path ahead. Such is earthly progress: it does not know what it seeks; having found what he desires, it is as if he no longer has it; desires again, seeks again. Heavy and unbearable for the sons of the world is the light of Christ's teaching. They flee from him into dark, desolate abysses: into absent-mindedness, into manifold amusements, into carnal amusements. There, in moral darkness, they spend their earthly life, without a spiritual, eternal goal. The Scriptures do not deign to deign such people with the name of men: a man who is in honor, not in understanding, is joined to senseless cattle and is likened to them (870). "A man is one who has come to know himself," said St. Pimen the Great [871]; A person is one who has come to know his meaning, his state, his purpose. The small animals of the sea are people who are not endowed with special abilities, who are not endowed with wealth or power, but even in this position they serve vanity and sin. They do not have the means to commit extensive and high-profile atrocities; but, guided, carried away, blinded by their own will, damaged by malice, they take part in the iniquities committed by great animals, — they themselves commit iniquities, according to their strength and means. They wander in the sea of life unconsciously, without a purpose. The serpent is the king of all who are in the waters [872], this serpent, whom thou hast created to curse him [873]. A fallen angel is called a serpent, because of the abundance of malice and deceit living in him. His slaves do not feel the chains with which they are bound from everywhere — and they call disastrous slavery in the name of freedom and supreme happiness. True Christians laugh at this serpent, seeing its intrigues by the purity of their minds, trampling on them by the power of Divine grace, which has overshadowed their souls. "Let us be like ships sailing harmoniously on the sea!" And a significant part of them is in the water; but they are not wholly submerged in water, as fish and other marine animals are immersed in it. It is impossible, it is impossible for him who crosses the sea of life not to be wet by its waters: he must not sink in its waters.