At the bedside of the dying, questions arise: why? What to do? Someone feels On the other hand, there are young people (and not only young people) People are voluntary helpers, for example, in hospices...

It seems to me that illness and suffering are given to us by God so that we could be freed from such attachment to life, which does not give us the opportunity to look to the future with openness, with hope. If everything were completely, we would not have the courage to depart from this perfection. But after all, The perfection that we have on earth is so far from that fullness, that we can receive in God!

And it seems to me that people who have been ill for a long time need help in two ways. First of all, in what I have just said, it is to help us realize that I am God now it frees me from captivity, gives me the opportunity not to be attached to life, which is so painful, painful, gives me the opportunity to look into another side — to the side where there will be no more pain, suffering, or fear, where the door will open and I will find myself in the face of the Savior Christ Himself, Who I went through all this myself. For Christ, by His own free will, entered into a life where death reigns, and suffering, and the loss of God, and by the way of our death, as if taking upon Himself all our human nature and mortality, returned to the realm of Divine eternity is the only way that frees us from everything that makes us captives, slaves.

And the second (and this seems to me very important): when we are seriously ill or go to death, those around us take care of us, and a person who is often sick worries about the that he became a burden to others. This is what the sick person needs to be dissuaded of. He did not become a burden. He gave some people happiness with the opportunity to show their love, their humanity, to be their companion through the last period life — into eternity. The sick must be persuaded that while they were healthy, strong, they cared for others, helped them, not necessarily in illness, just in life; Now they can receive from these people the love that they themselves sowed in their souls, and give them the opportunity to show their love and their gratitude. When we refuse the help of others during illness, we refuse them deprive us of the greatest happiness — to love us to the end. This is not necessary Our relatives are any person who responds to us.

I think that if one who cares for the dying could perceive what is happening to him, just sit next to him and do not contribute anything yourself, but only to be the most transparent, silent, as deep as possible, then probably he I would see how this man is at first blind to eternity, as if closed from eternity his flesh, his physicality, his humanity. Gradually, all this becomes more transparent, and the dying person begins to see another world. First I think a dark world, and then suddenly the light of eternity. I experienced it once: asked to sit with an old woman while she died. It was so obvious that At first she set sail from temporary, bodily, social life (she was very immersed in earthly life: she was 98 years old, and she came from the depths of her bed was engaged in its own commercial enterprises). And then gradually it went away, And suddenly she saw a dark world, a demonic world... And the light came into this world God's world, and this whole demonic world was scattered, and she entered into eternity. I I can't forget it, I was young then, I was a medical student of the first or second year, and I still have it.

Therefore, those young people who care for the sick, in addition to the fact that they give the patient the opportunity to accept love with gratitude and openness, which is given to them – this is very important – can sit with them at the moment, when the patient can no longer tell them in any way about what he is now sees or feels, but to know that the transition is now taking place, and to be with him This is time, the time of transition.

The issue arises more acutely in the case of the suffering of children...

The suffering of children puzzles us more than the suffering of adults, because, When an adult suffers, it is easier to see the benefits that could be to bring suffering, provided that a person grows to the full measure of his Calling. But can a suffering child learn something truly valuable? patience and humility, courage and endurance, trusting obedience? To me I remember the child mentioned in the life of the French saint XIX century. This priest asked a nine-year-old boy how he could to endure a painful illness that eventually brought him to the grave. That answered, "Father, I have learned not to feel yesterday's suffering today, and not to foresee tomorrow." Very few adults are capable of this, for suffering is whether it is moral anguish, mental distress or physical pain — usually becomes unbearable, because at every moment we seem to be carrying and we are experiencing all the past moments of pain and suffering and at every moment we are waiting that it would be like this forever, that it would never end. And we are not able to to confront all past and future suffering, though in most cases could withstand a specific portion of the suffering of our body or our soul in moment.

This example speaks of a nine-year-old child. What about small children, not yet capable of reasoning in this way? Can suffering mean anything to them? of an immortal soul or is it sheer nonsense and cruelty? We are inclined to to think that our spiritual growth takes place through the medium of reason, conscious response, by mental growth. We imagine that our spiritual life consists of sublime thoughts and deep feelings that unfold in us. But not in this is spiritual life, not the life of the Spirit. This is that intermediate an area that belongs neither to the body nor to the spirit. I will explain my words Comparison. We baptize a child. What we expect – if we expect at all something? Why do we think it makes sense? Because we believe that, consciously or not, the living spirit, the living soul of the child is able to meet the face of the the face of the Living God. Independently of any psychological perception, of any intellectual or emotional response, the living soul meets the Living God, and the sacraments of the Church are addressed to this living soul, which in its knowledge of God does not depends neither on the intellect, nor on consciousness, nor on anything of the kind.

But in that case, it is true of everything that happens in the body or the child's soul even before he can be aware of what is happening on the intellectual level. Therefore, if a child is sick at the age when We cannot expect him to consciously understand what is happening when he is not yet able to learn what requires will, intellect, mature feelings, active faith, active acceptance, this does not mean that what happens to him in It does not lead anywhere, that it will not become a positive event, or a positive contribution to his eternal life. And this, I think, is especially important parents, adults, when there is no contact with the child, as in case of mentally underdeveloped children. There is a limit to communication in the word, but no limit to other forms of communication. In the end, the meeting of two people takes place beyond words, it takes place where God is. In the Orthodox Church, we We insist that a pregnant woman must confess, must straighten out her life, to take communion, to pray, because the connection that exists between it and is such that everything that happens to her happens to the child. When A child is born, we expect that parents pray over him. We baptize, We anoint and commune infants on the same basis that I spoke of above: because the Living God can meet His living creature at that depth, which is far beyond any possibilities of human communication. When The child is sick, without conscious receptivity, there is always the possibility of pray over this child, pray for him, hold him before God and commune him his sacraments of the Church. If the parents and people around such a child were more would have realized this if, instead of trying to break through the impassable wall, they plunged into the depths where we all meet in God, then a tangible mutual connection could arise — a connection that the child perceives and which would be the beginning of an eternal relationship.

This also applies to death. God is not the God of the dead, He is the God of the living (Mark 12:27), and if we live in God, there is intimacy between us. Often, when The child leaves this life, the parents experience double grief. On the one hand, side, the child died. No more physical presence, no direct physical communication. But in addition, in a strange way, we imagine that a child who dies as an infant will forever remain one, that he will remain out of conscious contact, because on earth he is mentally developed and could not communicate at the level of intelligence and the emotions that we Associate. But it is a living soul, living in the Living God and His power, and if only we could reach the depths of our own soul, our own spirit, we could Without fear of being sure: nothing can separate us. When does it come the fullness of times, the fulfillment of everything, we will not meet on the level of our psychological richness or squalor, we will meet – spirit with spirit and soul to soul; We should be aware of this even now, on earth. Our Relationships with those who have departed from this life, not in the past or in the future: they are in the present, in the fleeting moment of the present in which we we meet with eternity, that is, with God. Our connection with those who have left this life, in the present, it belongs precisely to the category of eternity, and not to time. Yes, indeed, there is no physical meeting, physical communication, but in any We do not communicate at this level. Even in our present state, when There are relations between us, they are conditioned not just by mutual understanding at the level of words, language, symbols. We understand each other, relationships exist, insofar as For we meet in silence, in the depths, soul to soul. In some meaning, true communication begins where all methods of communication are left in the Side. True mutual understanding is beyond words. When Suffers child, we must accept by an act of faith his ability to grow more and more into close intimacy with God, because he is a living soul, and we must be sure that what happens to him is not in vain. And when children pass away, we must remember that God is the God of the living.

With all this, touch and physical contact should not be underestimated. Almost all religious rites are performed through contact: laying on of hands, Blessing – so much is done physically, and we must be aware spiritual abilities, the receptivity of our body to the realm of the spirit. Without a body, we could not partake of the sacrament of the Body and Blood of Christ, could not to partake of God. Through the body and through what it represents, is, we can have this union with Christ and God. In human Touch plays a tremendous role in relationships. So much compassion, love, tenderness can be conveyed by the touch of the hand, not by words and speeches, a — taking a person by the hand, putting your hand on his shoulder... This is even more so refers to sick children. Or rather, no, not only to children – because In a serious, serious illness, everyone becomes a child again. Touch so much can be conveyed, whether it is sacramental, sacred, or simply human (which is also sacred and sacramental), and this parents of sick children should be taught: where words are powerless, where there is no There is a mysterious way to convey the indescribable, that which impossible to express. Love, tenderness, compassion, but also faith and unshakable confidence – all this can be put into gestures and touches, in the way we treat the body.