For a tormented person, the strangeness of these realities grows into divinity. The tragedy, the accursed tragedy of our fantastic realities, forces man to create gods for himself, to look for gods where they were not hidden. Everything that is more unusual than man, both higher and more complex in nature, imposes itself on man as a deity. And it is natural that man has many gods, it is not surprising that he is a polytheist. Polydivinity is a consequence of the many-mindedness of the world. The whole world is a torment for the spirit, and every thing. Man cannot fully explain any torment by himself, but he has recourse to the gods. Many torments lead to many gods. Therefore, man on his painful historical path created many gods. It is difficult to understand them. Everyone offers themselves, and torments force a person to accept them.

The stronger the torment, the stronger the god it requires, the petty torments find minor gods. But there is one flour that is stronger than the strongest, flour in which all other flours are collected. The God who fills it with meaning and turns it into joy is truly God, and there is no other. This greatest torment is death. And with it suffering, good and evil, truth and falsehood. All together they constitute martyrdom problems, for every person who is tormented by these accursed problems is a martyr. 

Tormented by these problems, man must seek a man or a god who can solve them completely and definitively. Whoever completely and perfectly absolves of them is the true God, and the rest are false. There is not a single Feuerbachian man-god who has not gone bankrupt in the face of these problems. If you want to test the gods, do the same. Lay upon them your greatest torment; whoever fills it with meaning and truth deserves to be your God.

If you are overwhelmed by suffering and pursues you, shift it to your god. If he makes it his own, if he fills it with meaning and truth, then this is your true God and there is no lie or powerlessness in him. Likewise, your God is true if he lived in your body and gave meaning to your frailty; if he lived with your soul and delighted the bitter mystery of your life; if you were the apple of your tear-stained eye and saw and found the meaning of the fatal mystery of human life, over which you weep.

Martyric problems bring a person to the most terrible crossroads, to the religious crossroads, at which God is tested and chosen. Those who have not reached the religious crossroads, it means that they have not yet been visited by martyric problems. Standing at a religious crossroads, a person stands on burning coals. It is incredibly difficult to choose a god, and it is even harder to choose a better God. Man knows the moss of the universe, in which he builds a nest until he knows the best and only true God. Without God, all his knowledge is loose and weak, shallow and superficial. He doesn't know anything as he should. He does not know the answer to the terrible riddle of good and evil, which immeasurably surpasses everything that is called man. Therefore, he cannot attribute it to deities.

If this world were only an illusion, it could still be endured, but it is a nightmarish illusion, so it is difficult for a person to endure it without rebellion. To the Spiritualist matter appears to be an illusion; To the materialist, the spirit seems to be an illusion. Therefore, skepticism is the inevitable result of human thought. How does my thought about the world end, if not skepticism? If it does not end in this way, then it means that I have not thought out my thought to the end, I have not completed my feeling. Let a man send one of his thoughts out into the world. How will she return to him? Would she not return from a journey far more difficult, more mysterious than she had been before her journey?

Man has divided himself, has behaved in many paths in order to free himself from the torments of his existence. He created religions, created cultures to ease the terrible burden of existence. In search of valuables, a person inevitably came to a crossroads where bones break. Here its path branches, bifurcates into a multi-arm delta. How does the first arm, the thousandth, end? Is it not the ocean of infinity?

"Through many things I went to the meaning of life," said one desperate young man, "through many things and through many people, but, alas! Both things and people brought me to the accursed crossroads, to the coal-burning crossroads, and left me alone, surprised, stunned and ridiculed. Yes, ridiculed. Both through things and through people, someone laughed at me vilely, someone who was stronger than both things and people. And I could not endure this tyranny without a curse, for it was a tyranny of the worst kind. Mocked, I fled alone along your paths, and philosophy, and yours, science, and yours, culture, and all of them ended in pathlessness and wilderness. Yes, by the pathlessness and wilderness, from which my soul has become wild in my narrow body. And I sent her through many theories and hypotheses for an enduring value, but she came back to me all beaten and wounded. I sent her away exhausted, and she returned to me even more burdened with torment, even more burdened with horrors, and in her solitude gave birth to a hundred-headed hydra of despair. And I had to think the terrible thought of my newborn: a slippery worm, a long, long worm, is the axis of the universe. And in my mad despair, I myself rolled up and molded my soul around my long-suffering body and, ah, rolled it around the cross and the crucifix. Does not my body symbolize the cross? Are not my head, my feet, and my arms spread out, the cross and the crucifix, on which midnight rests, and around which the ghosts dance in a circle? By the psychophysical structure of his being, man is placed at the most cruel crossroads: between spirit and matter, good and evil, visible and invisible, sensual and intangible, these and that, "I" and "you"..."

Man is a path to new horrors and new sufferings. A certain monster is marching through a person, and who knows where? The human body serves him as a means of transport, the last stop of which is death. Death is an impenetrable wall; death is the inability to move forward... When a man chooses (and he is obliged to choose) something for the meaning of life, then let him cut short this nothing by death and find himself at a coal-burning crossroads, at which man cannot endure without God, without at least some kind of God. They say that culture is the meaning of life. Interrupt it with death, what will remain of this meaning? Interrupt by death all that man has created and all that humanism has created: can any of this be the meaning of life?

Man is the measure of all things, visible and invisible, this is the basic principle and criterion of humanism. But since man possesses neither the absolute meaning of life nor the absolute truth, then everything human is relative. Relativism is the soul of humanism. Einstein's theory of relativity is the final, final consequence of humanism and all its philosophical, scientific, religious, and cultural branches.

But not only that: at its last frontier, humanism is nihilism. How can a man not be a nihilist if he does not recognize any absolute value? Following the logical path to the end, we will inevitably come to the conclusion: relativism is the father of anarchism. Since all values are relative, then does any of them have the right to present themselves as supreme, as the highest and most important? Everyone else has the right to an anarchic revolt against it. There is no doubt that nihilism and anarchism are the inevitable, final, apocalyptic form of humanism and its relativism.

Humanism follows its specific logic in everything, when it renounces God, because it proclaimed man to be God. But carried to its conclusion, this logic denies both the world and man. Acosmism is the most natural and most logical consequence of atheism. For a person who consciously renounces God cannot but end up denying the world and man, if he does not fill them with meaning and truth. And that this is impossible for him, man has already irrefutably proved and shown in the most diverse ways.

Man loves to be God. This shows humanism. But none of the gods compromised himself so terribly as the man-worshipper. He could not comprehend death, suffering, or life. Can a person then be calm and satisfied with such a god? Does not man feel how the leech of death greedily sucks the apple of his soul and that of every other person? And he also boasts of man!

He who has surrounded himself as a wall with a man will find neither rest nor peace for his rebellious mind: he has not entered into a quiet refuge. All human paths lead to the grave; in it one is gathered, in it they remain, in it and are completed; In it, all the knots remain untied. Only then does man finally feel the weakness of his mind, his will, and his heart. Infirmity and bankruptcy. And this bankruptcy forces him to go further than man, above man, to a higher and stronger being than man: to All-being, All-Meaning and All-Meaning. Then he painfully and with all his strength feels that a person is something that needs to be completed, supplemented. Man has begun, but is incomplete. All man's striving for progress, for knowledge, all his search for something that transcends man, shows that man, remaining himself only with his nature, is insufficient for himself and is inadequate. He is the "arrow that yearns" for that shore, for that man, more complete and perfect, for the God-man.