We can't even forgive anyone: if you catch us, we're ready to shed tears that he said something to me, thought about something, looked at me somehow. Well, forgive him, forgive him, for the Lord requires this: "And forgive us our debts, as we also forgive our debtors." Has he sinned against you? Yes, he is wrong, he did not do well. Well, forgive him, be magnanimous, like God, Who forgives you millions of sins. You are not supposed to be fired at the church for your sins, and you are blissful here every Sunday. The Lord forgives you, but you cannot forgive such a little. There is no nobility, no complacency, nothing! A heart of stone, against the neighbor every bast in a line.

The Lord told a parable about a man who was forgiven ten thousand talents, but he did not forgive a few denarii to his comrade, his friend. This is how it will be with us: they will bind us to hell of fire. And we listen: fiery Gehenna, and we think that everyone is like that, giggles and hocks. Hell of fire is a reality, and if we do not destroy our heart, this stone stronghold, if we do not learn to love our neighbor, then our life will be fruitless, it will all be just an empty flower, "sounding brass and a tinkling cymbal." And we will not see the Kingdom of Heaven, because the Kingdom of Heaven is the kingdom of love. And the fact that we go to church and pretend to be something, smile, pretend to be meek – all this has no value. Nothing external has any value before God, but only internal, only our Christian order.

And we need to become exactly what the Lord wants us to be. We are not like that, but for the life that is left to us until death, we must have time to become so. How much work must be done, how much effort must be expended in order for a sick and frail person to become healthy? In any business, in order to do something, from a stool to an electronic computer, it is necessary to invest work. But the greatest effort is put into reaching the Kingdom of Heaven, because it requires from a person all the will, all the time, all the tension of the mind, all the tension of the heart, hands, legs; we must serve God with all our being, with every cell of our being, that is, we must constantly think about whether we are sinning, constantly thinking about whether we are not doing something that is contrary to God's commandment, and all the time breaking and forcing ourselves. Constantly grinding ourselves – this is exactly the kind of "meat grinder" of our heart, because it is a continuous sin, from beginning to end, and it must be made merciful.

And this is possible only with the help of the grace of God. After all, in order to fix a device, you need a person who knows how this device works. And in order to correct our heart, that is, to return it to its original purity, we need the power that created the heart. Only the Lord Himself can correct us. That is why the Church calls Him the Savior, because only He, Christ Himself, can save us from this state. And if the Lord sees that our will, all the strength of our heart, our whole mind – everything is turned to salvation, that we thirst for it with all our might, not in words, but in deeds, that is, we constantly make an effort on ourselves, constantly strive to correct ourselves – then gradually we will be corrected. The Lord will give us strength, the Lord will purify us, because we will put in the work, and the Lord, seeing this work, will not leave it in vain, He will certainly help us, He will definitely come, because the Lord knows that we are weak, the Lord knows that we are worthless people of the twentieth century, who have lost all the good that He has put in us. The Lord knows everything very well: our infirmities, our worries, our disorders – the Lord knows everything and requires of us only the effort of which each of us is capable.

Salvation is a Christian feat, we must always move. Every day lived should be a movement towards salvation. It is not easy to live it, to go with the flow, to fall asleep in the evening and wake up in the morning – every day you need to try to fulfill God's commandment, every day you need to try to get closer to God, every day you must definitely take this step. And this procession of ours is as difficult, as strenuous as walking underwater, where each step is given with great difficulty. We are hindered by what has clung to us – our sins. But in overcoming, in fact, there is salvation. Therefore, only the ascetic is saved, the one who tries to serve God and please Him is saved. And if we learn this, then the Lord will help us, He will heal us. By the mercy of God, faith has been granted to us – the beginning has already been laid; by the mercy of God we have been granted baptism; and by the mercy of God we will also receive salvation, only we must desire it.

This desire should be expressed not in the outer life, but in a change in one's nature and in the softening of one's own heart. The Apostle Paul says so: if you move mountains by your prayer, if you have even given your body to be burned, but have not acquired love, then this is nothing. And so our love for our neighbor or lack of love is manifested everywhere and constantly. It's not some feeling that arose and then disappeared. Love is a quality of the soul, it is a creative force. It does not depend on feeling, it does not depend on the weather, on the state of health. If a person has love, then he cannot, even when he is sick or tired, be irritated, because love is not irritated. She never seeks benefit for herself; love never humiliates another; love endures everything, forgives everything; She is always ready to sacrifice herself for another, whether it is your wife or your enemy, for love does not discriminate. Your enemy is hungry, said the Lord, feed him. And you need to acquire such a quality for your soul. But water does not flow under a lying stone, so you need to make a constant effort, constantly force yourself, constantly force.

The feast of the Nativity of the Mother of God has come, and a person has decided that it is necessary to celebrate it with some good deed – let's say he is not talking to someone. Then he goes and breaks down this wall of alienation so that love reigns between them. And immediately the Lord helped, and softened the heart of another, and peace was restored. What a beauty, how pleased the Lord! And this is a trifle, such an insignificant incident, but there is a celebration in Heaven on this occasion, because two more souls are united in love. When a person is reconciled with the one who has told him insolence, and the war between them is over, it will truly be a feat – a person will move towards the Kingdom of Heaven.

And we can perform dozens of such feats every day, constantly overcoming the strife of this age, constantly overcoming ill-will and malice. You spat in my face – well, okay, I'll wipe it off, I forgive you. If you feel like it, spit again, just calm down. That's all, and I'll be patient. And if we always do this, then gradually we will begin to worry more not about ourselves – that someone has pinched us, pressed us, said something wrong to us – but about the person who is experiencing sorrow. After all, when a person is angry with us, swears at us, presses us, he suffers even more from this, because we irritate him; So, you need to feel sorry for him and try to correct your behavior so as not to irritate him. This is a vast field of activity for the manifestation of a new quality of the soul. And even if there is no such quality, we must still try to do it for the sake of God, overcoming that sin, that laziness, pride, vanity, malice, envy that are present in our hearts.

In this overcoming of the sinful self lies the value of our efforts before God, Who sees that we are trying, not just living with the flow, but working hard in order to sail into the Kingdom of God. And only in this way, with diligence, can it be achieved, because salvation depends on two factors. The first, the most important and important, is the will of God, which is aimed at our salvation. The Son of God Himself came, died on the Cross, in order to save us. The second factor is the human will. That is why the Lord said: "If anyone has faith and is baptized, he will be saved." If you believe the words of Christ and are baptized – these two factors are combined. "But whoever does not believe will be condemned." The Lord desires our salvation, but if we do not believe the words of Christ, if we constantly deny these words, then we will be condemned.

It is very easy to understand. Orthodoxy is a global worldview, the most perfect of all existing in the world. This is the strictest, most comprehensive view of the world. Any philosophical current of thought, any harmonious system is shattered in its inconsistency against the stronghold of Orthodoxy. It has an answer to absolutely all the questions of existence, and at the same time it has amazing simplicity. But this is all theory; And any theory without practice is nothing, an abstraction. And we lack this practice, the desire to act, our will is too relaxed. We are like, "It would be nice, of course" – but we don't lift a finger ourselves. We are all lying down, but we must first force ourselves to sit down, and then, having swayed, at least stand on our weak legs and begin to take a step at a time – the first step, then the second, the third, so that every day will be a step towards the Kingdom of Heaven. Then this procession will be our path of the cross to Golgotha, the path to salvation, to purification, to liberation from the burden of sin.

Spiritual life consists only in inner work. The Christian life is the renunciation of oneself. We, being sinners, must constantly renounce our sin. But we have grown so close to sin, we are so addicted to sin, that when we renounce it, it hurts us. And we don't want pain; We only want to sit in our shells, so that everyone feels sorry for us, pleases us, praises us, so that we are fed, and nothing hurts us yet, and we have a lot of time, and everything in general. And this is not what life consists of. Life is a constant blow, because the Lord is trying to stir us up, to allow us sorrows, which seem to inspire us with the idea that this existence that we are trying to arrange for ourselves is very shaky. Well, you lie down in comfort for ten or fifteen minutes - and already your side is lying down, you have to turn over to the other, again inconvenience. That is, the Lord constantly forces us to move, to move, even when lying on the bed. And we must try to gather our soul, our heart, all our will, and compel ourselves. The Lord said so: "From the days of John the Baptist the Kingdom of God is needed, and only those who use force take it away." Amen.

Church of the Exaltation of the Holy Cross, September 27, 1986, evening

6th Sunday after Pentecost