The Five Ways to a Child's Heart will introduce you to five parenting behaviors to help determine which path will lead you to your child's heart, and which behavior fits your child's "love language." Having learned the necessary, effective way of communicating with your child, you should study the other four ways, the four ways in which you can prove your love to the child, since everything will benefit him. In addition, it happens that the ways of communication, the ways of expressing your feelings, need to be changed – after all, your child also changes – he grows.

Therefore, at the beginning of each of the five chapters, we explain why this path is important for your child. Even if this chapter describes a model that is not characteristic of him, still read it carefully. Follow all five paths of love, and do not doubt, the child will understand you. However, we repeat, the most important thing is to determine the most understandable language of communication, his native "language of love" and master it.

In this book, we repeatedly emphasize how important love is in raising children. The main parental task is to raise a mature responsible person. Whatever qualities you develop in him, the main thing is to build education on love. Even the child's anger will serve for the good of him and those around him, if he is sure of your love. The child is more likely to listen to your advice and follow it when he sees that he is truly loved no matter what. Few parents realize that they have to teach their child to be in control of their feelings.

As we point out in Chapter 10, teaching a child and adolescent how to deal with anger is the most difficult task for parents. Success depends entirely on love. Parents who help their teen deal with anger also establish a more trusting and cordial relationship with them.

The book "Five Ways to the Heart of a Child" first of all teaches you to love a child. You will find advice on raising children in it. If you put love at the forefront, you will soon find that family relations become stronger, tension disappears. When we talk about parenting and discipline (Chapter Eight), you'll learn two key intonations that parents should never forget: benevolence and firmness. Love atones for sins. You should always remain benevolent but firm. In Chapter Eight, we will discuss how to hold this position no matter what.

The book ends with a guide for parents. There you will find tasks and exercises that will tell you how to talk to your child so that he understands you. We hope that this guide will help you put into practice what you will read in the book.

However, before you open this textbook that will teach you how to love children and start mastering the shortest way to your child's heart, we want to say a few parting words to you.

FROM THE AUTHORS

The success of my book "Five Love Languages" gave me a lot of joy. Thousands of people have not only read the book, they have internalized its principles and put into practice the advice given in it. I receive hundreds of letters from all over the world thanking me for helping them build a relationship with their companion. Since they try to speak each other's "native language," the emotional climate in the family has improved. And some even believe that the book saved their marriage.

I still teach marriage seminars, and I often hear, "When will there be a book on how to find a 'mother tongue' with children?" Many parents write to me that after getting along with their spouse, they tried to find the right way to communicate, their child's "love language," and it worked. But I've never worked with children—I counsel couples—so I just didn't dare to write a book about children.

But the publishers started talking to me about this project. I was considering their proposal while I contacted Ross Campbell, an old friend of mine. I asked him to be my co-author. Ross agreed, and this predetermined the birth of the book. For thirty years, Ross has been engaged in psychiatry, working mainly with children and adolescents. I always admire him as a specialist, I have learned a lot from his work and I always value our friendship.

Now that the book is almost ready, I am glad that we were able to combine our knowledge. We wrote each chapter independently, then editor Carol Streeter brought our ideas together. I really like what I got as a result.

My first book helped many people to improve their relationship with their spouses. I pray to God and hope that this book will help thousands of parents, teachers; everyone who, by the nature of their work, encounters children; to everyone who loves them.

Gary Chapman, Ph.D., Winston–Salem, North Carolina